That is illogical captain! - Logical inconsistencies in otherwise fine games
Get up, get up, get up, get down, fall over.
United Kingdom
Bolton
Lancashire
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Is it just me? Look, I don't want to get tagged as some sort of green ink merchant. The sort of person that stands on street corners advising all comers to wear a tinfoil hat to stop the CIA from controlling your mind but...
Some games, just a few. The gameplay is great, neat mechanic, nice theme but...
Somehow there is just something, perhaps one action or a point you always reach that just niggles and niggles and niggles because, in the context of the theme, it is just not logical. And it gets worse over time. It builds with every play. One day you blurt it out and are ignored. Then suddenly people don't want to play this game with you. They are afraid you are going to start banging on about the same old point over and over again.
Are you following me?
Let me explain by way of an example. Then please, add more, show me I am not alone. 
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bruno faidutti
France
LES ANGLES
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what do you mean, capatain, if we use our knowlede, we lose it?
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david buchmann
Switzerland
bern
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Lots of people risking to get killed by nuclear accidents, but the people refuse to walk even a single field. They prefer dying while waiting for a car or helicopter to pick them up. Extremly illogic (but maybe sadly realistic) is the fact that every player only wants to save his own guys and lets the others to die.
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Erik Miller
United States
Naperville
Illinois
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Well... so the ancient one woke up and we have to fight him. Good thing I have my handy elephant gun!
Shoot once....
NO! I need more ammo! you! Ammo guy! quick! give me some more ammo!
Not unless you pay me!
Pay you! pay you? do you see what's coming? give me the ammo now!
No! Money first!!!!
Sounds of screaming and investigators dying...
Apparently capitalism works no matter what is coming to kill you
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An inmate can go in the radio room and order guards around, and noone is ever the wiser. Even after he's gone, the next guard in the room doesn't even recall them to their previous positions!
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Somehow the libraries are income-producing properties, but inns produce no income.
How does that work? Even if one takes into account that some libraries historically did require subscriptions to use them (and even today, free libraries get money from taxpayers to function), how...HOW...are inns not income-producing? Makes me want to go all Inigo Montoya on the designers (of this otherwise fine game!)..."Inn? You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.")
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King Ævil
South Euclid
Ohio
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The wily polar bear (Ursus maritimus) of the Serengeti must stay alert at all times, lest he be surprised by a marauding gang of elephants or orcas.
That's not the only weird link in the food web of Frank's Zoo, but it's arguably the weirdest.
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Ryan Tullis
United States
Florida
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*A blue Meeple tries to start building directly in a Red Meeples city*
- HEY. You can't build here, this place is mine! Get outta here!
*The blue Meeple leaves, only to start building a city two inches away*
- Look at that! Well, since he's physically not touching my town, I doubt this will ever become a problem. What a cute neighbor. Haha. WAIT. He just connected to my city? WOW. Didn't see that coming. Well, guess we'll just share it now. Huh. Look at that, another of his people are building a separate city right next to ours, too. What a coincidence!
The red Meeple was never heard from again.
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Mike Hulsebus
United States
Ann Arbor
Michigan
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In Alibi, it's possible to have ruled out that murder (possibly done with a gun, mind you] didn't happen in the front seat or trunk of a car, but to not yet have a clue if it happened in the back seat.
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You connect different cities to your network. Then you decide if you want to power them or not. Who would want to buy electricity from a company that randomly decides to disconnect you because you they ran out of coal? Must be fun living in a city where electrical power turns on and off for no reason. And you can still earn money somehow, even without powering any cities at all.
Garbage is more expensive than coal and oil COMBINED.
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Marcus Perry
United States
Kentucky
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"I am attacking you... ok... I am aiming at your main warship... Three hits... WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE SHOTS WENT ASTRAY AND HIT YOUR WEAKEST TARGETS???"
Sure... in war the enemy decides where your shots go... yeah.
Still a great game though!
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Green: entering a room "Ohboy, I'm not alone in here... Hey buddy! I think we ought to swap some items here, right?"
Blue: "Well, yeah. If you say so.. let's have a look... here, i got something nice for you."
Green: "All right, here, have a look at this."
unwrapping gifts...
Blue: "BOOHYA! I just gave you an evil infection IN A BOX! Now you are infected and have to kill your former friends and their android sidekicks! *Muharhar*"
Green: "Hold on! *BOING FLIP* Look at what your secret santa gave you: A GAS CAN! In your face, IN YOUR FACE, evil space alien!! Now I somehow survived your handshake of death and can
A) brag about it and
B) tell everyone what evil extraterrestrial entity breeds behind your otherwise completely honest-looking face!"
Blue: "Wait, what? A gas can? How is this supposed to help you against my..."
Green: "HEY GUYS, OVER HERE, WE GOT HIM!"
Blue: "But hey! This makes absolutely no ..."
Red: arriving "Where is he? I will punch him in the face!"
Yellow: arriving "I will chop his head off!"
Red: "Me first, me first!"
Green: "There you are. LET'S KICK SOME ASS!" ...
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This fine article will give you some further insight on other illogicalities of this otherwise wonderful game, and provide an unexpected yet nifty explanation for most.
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jonathanWC
United States
Missoula
Montana
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Ok, bear with me as I work this out.
Throughout the game things happen to cause you to lose teeth--permanently. The winner of the game is the person that has the most teeth left. At the start of the game on your score sheet you have 28 teeth. 28 teeth...instead of 32. This then presumes that you were obviously able to afford some dental care in order to have your wisdom teeth removed!
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Clay
United States
Alabama
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Alright, so there's a twelve hour clock and every time it hits twelve that signals that midnight has come and... wait, what was that? You say that midnight only comes once every twenty-four hours? Well, I'm sure that... the um... something something Mythos...
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Håvard Sørensen
Norway
Oslo
Oslo
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"Sir, our airline portfolio is doing great, maybe we should use our surplus to invest in the red company, if we do that, they can afford to start up a new line between London and Paris"
"Sounds great, how much do they need"
"5 million euro, sir"
"Thats about the sum we have to invest, sounds fine. We could use to raise our ownership percentage with the red company anyway"
"Uhm.. Sir, we can't raise our ownership percentage as it isn't any red stocks in the share market"
"But we just invested 5 millions in the company, how is that possible if I'm not to get any shares from it?!?"
"Well, sir. You do get shares just not in the red company, you can pick a grey or white one!"
"So, what are you saying? We invest 5 million dollars in a company but get share ownership in another company?"
"That's exactly what I am saying, sir!"
[Facepalm]
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Chris Broggi
United States
Southwick
Massachusetts
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"Sir, our settlement is growing. We should incorporate into a town and build a town hall."
"Well, we can become a town alright, but we can't build that town hall until we become a city."
"But wouldn't that then be a city hall?"
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Ricardo Donoso
Brazil
RIBEIRÃO PRETO
Sao Paulo
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I love this game, but the logical inconsistencies... Endless!!!
- Mr. president, what should we do in our Capital?
- A mighty Cathedral! That would just be PERFECT.
- Sr. Mr. President, there are already 5 on the world, so, we can't build more.
- Really? Ok, then, let's build Barracks to train our soldiers.
- Errr... Sorry Mr. President, there are already too many barracks in the world also.
- Ok then. Let's build more Catapults.
- Can't be done. All the catapults in the world have been built. We have the technology and the production, but we can not make more until some of them are destroyed, ours or opponents.
- So, what do you suggest?
- We Destroy one of the other nation's Barracks/Cathedrals, so THEN we can build one for us.
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Ricardo Donoso
Brazil
RIBEIRÃO PRETO
Sao Paulo
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As I was saying... ENDLESS inconsistencies...
- My King, the great Wright created an AIRPLANE, we can use it to attack our foes!
- Ok, let's build more of those airplanes.
- We can't eminence, we don't know how to.
- Ok, ask him to build more of those to us.
- Sorry my King, we had to sacrifice him in order to get our airplane.
- Damn! At least we have one.
- Not anymore my King, apparently the Germans used their knowledge on monarchy to throw silk at us, and our airplane was destroyed by the silk.
- THEY DID WHAT????
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Ricardo Donoso
Brazil
RIBEIRÃO PRETO
Sao Paulo
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Just one more
- My Lord, exchanging ideas with the Indians we learned Agriculture. Now we can evolve our capital into a Metropolis.
- Great! Do so. TO the capital and all the other cities.
- Sorry, can't do. Only the Capital can become a metropolis.
- Why? The other cities are so well positioned, even better positioned then the metropolis!
- Can't do Lord, don't know really why, but we can't do it.
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Grant Fikes
United States
Abilene
Texas
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"I need to charter a flight to London as soon as possible!"
"Well, you came to the right place, mate. Welcome to Charlie's Charter Plane Place, the best place in Sydney to charter a flight to anywhere in the world. We offer free Vegemite with every flight, because this is Australia, and all stereotypical Australians like that stuff!"
"Um, crap. I left my money in my wallet back at the Center for Disease Control in Atlanta. I guess I won't be able to affo–"
"You work for the CDC? Then why didn't you say so in the first place! For employees of the CDC, we gladly accept pieces of paper with 'Sydney' written on them as a form of payment, and you can fly anywhere in the world!"
"You mean like this one?"
"Yes, mate! That piece of paper will work nicely!"
"But I can't give it to you! This piece of paper contains 20% of the information we need to discover the cure for redness! If I give this to you, then we may have a harder time discovering the cure and saving the world!"
"Maybe you'll want to check with my brother Dirk, at Dirk's Direct Flight Emporium. Since you're working with the CDC, he'll take payment in the form of a piece of paper with the name of your destination city written on it!"
"But that's even worse! This piece of paper with London written on it will help us discover a cure for blueness, and is the reason I need to get to London in the first place! Our scientist has 75% of the information she needs to cure blueness, and if I meet her in London to give her this information, she'll be in a good position to cure blueness once and for all! Losing this information is not an acceptable price for me!"
"Well, mate, I guess you're out of luck."
"This isn't fair! I'm an Operations Expert! I build research stations for a living – you know, like the one I just built right here in Sydney? Without my research stations, we wouldn't have been able to find the cure for yellowness!"
"Whoa, really? That's awesome, mate. Tell you what – just this once for you, since there's a research station here, my brother and I will let you fly anywhere you'd like, if you give us a piece of paper with the name of any city at all."
"Perfect! I have this one with Santiago. It has information on curing yellowness, so we don't need that one anymore."
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Ricardo Donoso
Brazil
RIBEIRÃO PRETO
Sao Paulo
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I am investigating in the museum, I see things that really bothers me, so, I go back to the entrance, give the body of two or three monsters to the owner of the gift shop and he gives me medical attention and... he is ALSO a shrink!
Great! With those 3 hours of medical/psychological care, I am ready to get back to saving the world!
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Benjamin Maggi
United States
Clifton Park
New York
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The object of the game is to go around the board and collect five pieces of candy, put on your costume by landing on the costume space matching your character, and run back to the pumpkin patch to meet Linus and await the Great Pumpkin.
Inconsistency #1:
Even if you received an invitation to a party why would you stop trick-or-treating skip collecting candy on Halloween? In the movie, the gang went trick-or-treating first and then attended the party. Here, you stop going around for candy and rush to the party as soon as you receive an invitation.
Inconsistency #2:
Further, if you get an invitation to a party why do you then run to the pumpkin patch to win the game? In the movie, going to the pumpkin patch was the opposite of going to the party. Unless the "party" is sitting alone in a pumpkin patch while everyone else is at a "non-party" place with games, candy, and fun.
Inconsistency #3:
In the movie if you pull a rock you must lose a piece of candy. In the movie, getting a rock meant you didn't receive a piece of candy at that house. Never did Charlie Brown pull a rock and say "I got a rock, I guess I better give this house some of the candy I have in my bag. Let's reward this house for being stingy and passing around stones."
Inconsistency #4:
The game lets you buy candy from other people for a quarter each. Now, I suppose if I had money I would buy other people's candy but if I really wanted to be smart I would just go to the store and buy a BAG of candy.
Inconsistency #5:
It is possible for Charlie Brown to win the game by getting candy and getting invited to a party. 'Nuff said.
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372.
Board Game: Eclipse
[Average Rating:8.34 Overall Rank:7]
Watch out for the
Sweden
Help, I'm being held prisoner in an overtext typing facility! I don't have much time, they could find out at any m
I'm that weirdo whose number of badges sold prior to yesterday Bail Organa is keeping track of
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"All our star systems suck. We should explore to find better ones."
"It's no use, admiral. The guys with the good systems already used them to find the maximum number of systems known to exist around here. They were over at their places."
"But no one's even looked outside our place."
"Sorry."
"Wow, for each discovery we make in this field of technology, each new one becomes easier!" (later) "Now we've learned so much about it it's become impossible to learn anything more at all."
"Admiral, our fleet has completed its massive orbital bombardment, but there are still pockets of population holding out."
"Huddling uselessly in underground shelters, I take it?"
"Well, no, actually they're busy doing lab work and accounting."
"What?"
"... And shipping out the proceeds."
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In Mage Knight one levels up by collecting "Fame". Leveling up increases your armor value. Which results in the following odd scenario:
High Dragon: "Roaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar!!!" (blasts Norowas with a lethal barrage of flame)"
Norowas: "Nice try at knocking me out, but I'm afraid that I'm just too famous and good-looking to be severely damaged by you. Too bad ... *dispatches high dragon with disintigrate* 
The "Call to arms" spell is sorta strange too. Wait... so by using this spell I've somehow teleported this unit halfway across the board, convinced them to fight for me, magically prevented them from getting injured during the battle, and then teleported them back where they came from? If I can do all that, why did I need their help in the first place? 
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Ricardo Donoso
Brazil
RIBEIRÃO PRETO
Sao Paulo
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My favorite game!
No matter the number of civilizations on the world, it is NEVER a globe.
Triangle, giant square or deformed star... but never a globe.
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Teppo Saarinen
Finland
Turku
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Funny exam answers from the Ravensburger Elementary:
In 1492, Columbus found and landed in the New World, in a port which he built with his own two hands.
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you come live in Argentina and I'll show you 
ends up being more expensive than 
and 
combined 
