I am going to shove those dice up your...(people and their dice issues)
Preston Fuller
United States
Ashland
New Hampshire
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We have all seen it, people at the gaming table that just can't roll dice without a major issue of somekind occuring. I am not talking about people who grumble about the luck of dice but rather people who just can't bleeping roll dice.


This is a geeklist about such people.
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26. Board Game: Munchkin Dice [Average Rating:6.52 Unranked] [Average Rating:6.52 Unranked]
Beer be with you.
United States
Northlake
Illinois
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Settlers of Catan does not improve with your house rules. The best option if you don't like the rules as written is to just select another game.
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How about the guy who has specialty dice that have logos on either the ones or the sixes? Seems like when he needs a high number those logos are always sixes and when he needs low numbers, they are ones.
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27. Board Game: Dragon Dice [Average Rating:5.69 Overall Rank:6365]
Scott Nisenfeld
United States
Pikesville
Maryland
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The Specialist.

The man that has a die for all occasions. Again most common in PnP, but the habit i think has roots in Risk.
This is my sneak attack die. This is my lock pick die. This is my dodge die. This black d20 is used to kill characters. (and yes, my friends and I stole our GM's character killer d20 from him... it was to prevent him from committing crimes against humanity.)
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28. Board Game: Dragon's Hoard [Average Rating:6.00 Unranked]
Joshua Kenney
United States
North Haledon
NJ
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The Hoarder

This is most annoying in games like HeroQuest where this is a small, limited number of special dice that everyone shares. So when a hero has to roll 4d6 to attack, and Zargon's rolling 2d6 to defend, where are ALL 6 dice?


"Jesse!"
"What?"
"Give us the dice!"
"Huh?" *looks in his hand* "Whoops. My bad. I had them from my attack."
"You didn't even attack this turn."

Every. Single. Time.

It got to the point where the person sitting next to him had to take the dice away after every roll.

To be fair, in games that use standard number dice he brings his own and plenty to share.
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29. Board Game: It's a Small World Game [Average Rating:6.50 Unranked]
Jeff Inks
United States
Fayetteville
North Carolina
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Small Dice

I played D&D with a guy who had small d20s, probably 1/2 size or smaller. If you were more than two feet away from him you couldn't see the numbers. He would roll his die, announce his success and pick up the die. Quickly. I think he had a small set of d10s as well. It has been a while.



Why do I know a disproportionate number of cheaters? They all had their own style and fooled no one.

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30. Board Game: No Dice [Average Rating:6.98 Overall Rank:5892]
Nicolas Varela
Chile
Santiago
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The "I don't do dice" guy

I've know many gamers who just refuse to play games which include dice. "Tss, tss... there's too much luck involved" or "I can't execute my 36-hours planned strategy" kind of phrase lover. This is a no-luck integrist, and any game with dice is immediately discarded as "dice-fest" or simply "plain rubbish". shake
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31. Board Game: Tricky [Average Rating:6.36 Unranked]
United States
Minden
Nevada
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The Trickster usually appears when either boredom or drunkenness have overtaken a player's ability to give a shit about the actual game. Some of the antics in a Trickster's repertoire include the Rainbow (flicking a die, in a tall arch, from under the table), the Pincer (squeezing a stack of die between the index finger and thumb until they explode outward), the Globetrotter (attempting to slide a die down the length of an outstretched arm), the Pimphand (tossing a die in the air and either punching or slapping it), and the Ricochet (bouncing a die off the wall onto the table). In cases of more unrestrained revelry, the Trickster has even been known to employ the Watermelon (spitting dice out one at a time like watermelon seeds).

The one element common to all of the Trickster's shenanigans is that they inevitably result in dice flying wildly off the table and getting lost.
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32. Board Game: Spin the Bottle [Average Rating:1.50 Unranked]
Paul Dale
Australia
Moggill
Queensland
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The dice spinner

The dice spinner is a peculiar person. During down time, they attempt to spin their dice on a point or face. The goal is either to see how many easy dice can be kept spinning at once or how long a single difficult die can be spun for.

The easy ones are the mostly round ones and this includes the usual polyhedral dice apart from the d4.

Very therapeutic.


- Pauli
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33. Board Game: Time Agent [Average Rating:6.65 Overall Rank:2698]
Mike Hill
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The Guy with Bad Timing

Ive played games with this guy for years, and sometimes he just has the worst timing. This guy needs an average roll to complete something or kill something, but ends up rolling REALLY Well. Then hell go up against a tough enemy or challenge and he gets a Crappy roll. Bad timing I say...gotta stop wasting those good rolls on the little guy.
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34. Board Game: Bounce-Off [Average Rating:7.00 Unranked]
James Webb
United Kingdom
Canterbury
Kent
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The Bouncer

We had one particularly prolonged (and painful) game of Risk where one player insisted in bouncing dice off things 'for luck'. Walls, glasses, boxes, anything. If it had a solid surface he'd bounce a dice or two off it. Because what you really want when playing a game like Risk are unpredictable projectiles ricocheting around the board.

He would then compare rolls to try and determine which object gave him the best luck. Inevitably, the lowest point of the evening came when he accidentally bounced a dice off my ribs, got exactly the result that he wanted and then proceeded to throw dice at me all evening claiming that "Your chest is lucky".

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35. Board Game: Risk [Average Rating:5.59 Overall Rank:9324]
eric v
United States
Falls Church
Virginia
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The SmartyPants

My 9 year-old and I play nasty Risk games. Once he did set up the board and bits, allocated dice for both of us, and off we went.

Took me a couple of turns to wonder why:
a- all my dice rolls were amazingly low
b- my son was beaming like never

The sneaky little fellow had given me three six-sided dice with only 1s, 2s and 3s on them... From one of his child games. Not trying to cheat just being so happy he was tricking me.

But since like father like son, how can I blame him?

Needless to say I still felt like a fool.

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36. Board Game: Pre-Emptive Strike! [Average Rating:6.00 Unranked]
Bossko B.
England
Brierley Hill
The Black Country
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The player that rolls dice before his turn. Then you turn to them and, look, they just rolled a Critical Hit!
Wow, amazing that

Often they constantly roll the dice between turns and when they make a good roll say, "I'm keeping that roll for my go."
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37. Board Game: Parallel Worlds [Average Rating:0.00 Unranked]
J. R. Tracy
United States
New York
New York
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Parallel Universe Guy - this fellow makes the rolls to resolve the action he *didn't* take, just to see what would've happened. In ASL, this can lead to long strings of "Here's the shot I didn't take...here's your morale check...oops, that's my sniper - let's see where it goes...."

Pretty soon there's an entirely different version of the scenario being played out on a parallel plane existing only in this guy's mind. I know this guy very well, because I *am* this guy.

JR
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38. Board Game: Yahtzee [Average Rating:5.22 Overall Rank:10700]
Stephen Cappello
United States
Columbia
Maryland
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the Yahtzee Roller

This is the person that yells "Yahtzee!" after every die roll, reguardless of the result or even the game being played.

Other variants include: the "Craps!" or "Yo Eleven" roller; the "Booyah!" roller.
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39. Board Game: Group Therapy [Average Rating:5.55 Unranked]
Scott Nisenfeld
United States
Pikesville
Maryland
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One with the Die

The person that keeps their dice on their body at all times to "Attune" the dice. They will also whisper sweet nothings to them, couch them on what to roll, yell at them when they fail (not to loudly). They will also put dice that aren't preforming in a "timeout" box, to wait for a "Re-education session".

WARNING!! NEVER TOUCH THIS PERSONS PERSONAL DICE!!!
You will be treated exactly as if you had step between a Momma bear and her cub. The next 3 hours will then be wasted as the person performs a "dice cleansing".
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40. Board Game: Formula-1 [Average Rating:6.66 Overall Rank:2065]
Charles Picard
United States
California
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My wife is the Queen of Low Rollers. If she rolls a single d6 she rolls a 1 *seemingly* half the time.

This causes her no end of annoyance and she sometimes gets shouting mad about it. She often accuses me of having too much luck and leaving none for her. (We've played a couple of really grim games of G.E.V..)

We play a lot of Arkham Horror, so I've learned to use this to my advantage. There are a couple of creatures that do damage when they activate and a 3-6 is rolled on a d6.

Guess who gets to make that roll every time?
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41. Board Game: Count Your Blessings [Average Rating:6.00 Unranked]
Charles Picard
United States
California
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Then there's me...

The Blessed Dice guy.

Of course it's absurd, but there's a set of dice that I use for RPG play that I'm convinced are blessed. They are off-the-shelf chessex opaque green dice, but I've won my share of tournaments, etc., with them and they seem to have an almost mystical ability to come through in the clutch.

And NO you can't borrow them. You're lucky I'm letting you look at them!

What drives me the craziest is when people with un-luck want to borrow them. I'm looking at you Clint! That's the last thing I want, some hopeless crappy roller laying his Mojo hand on my dice.

Heck, I've even gone so far as to buy dice for people in my gaming group so they won't even think about reaching for mine.


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42. Board Game: Crazy Cocktails [Average Rating:4.00 Unranked]
BorderCon is Live!!!
Australia
Lavington
New South Wales
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The Cockhead

Then there is the gamer who despite having 4 square feet of table to roll dice in, they can't help but roll one or more dice onto something, causing them to be cocked.

Sessions of LnoE spring to mind here. There's lots of dice but they are so small. Sometimes this one guy will roll a dice half a meter and watch it wind its way through a range of cards and other components before it seeks a cosy location to cock itself.

Combine this with our 'always re-roll cocked dice rule' and a turn can go forever.
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43. Board Game: All is lost save Honour [Average Rating:7.77 Overall Rank:4278]
BorderCon is Live!!!
Australia
Lavington
New South Wales
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The Honour Guard

Then there is the tool that can't help himself during conflict games that have minis...think RISK, Nexus Ops and the like.

This one guy back in high school would wait for a really critical battle and before he would roll he would line up two rows of units about 10cms apart, about 5-6 rows deep.

I asked him what the heck he was doing and he said he was making an 'Honour Guard' for the dice to give them good luck! shake
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44. Board Game: NUTS! [Average Rating:6.00 Overall Rank:6560]
Steve Smith
United States
Georgia
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The ITCHY ROLLER

This is the guy with an itchy ass or groin who occasionally finds clothing to be too much of a barrier to satisfactorily attend to this itch. This often leads to one becoming the guy who MUST have their own personal dice.
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45. Board Game: Let's Go Shopping [Average Rating:0.00 Unranked]
J H
United States
Billings and Bozeman
Montana
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I haven't seen this one posted yet.

I used to work at a gaming store, and watching certain gamers purchasing loose dice would be hilarious! They'd literally spend 15 minutes rolling various loose dice, trying to find the "luckiest" one.

If that gamer ran into a bad luck streak, they'd be back to buy more loose dice. Their "dice trial" rituals would keep me entertained, and I'd even help!

I've also seen some gamers find a few extra "lucky" loose dice, which they would never use until a gaming emergency. They didn't want to wear out all of the luck until they really needed it.

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46. Board Game: Norseman: Viking Kingdoms of the North Sea [Average Rating:5.41 Unranked]
John Brock
United States
Pennsylvania
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Game chosen in honor of the subject of this entry, affectionately known to us as "Eric the Red".

Our group started out as ASLers, and the ASL community has long been rent in twain by a great religious dispute:
Dice cup or dice tower?

As it happens, we all went the route of using dice glasses. This worked well for most of us. (Although there was that one time, in the early days before we each "dedicated" a glass to gaming, when someone was using the same type of glass for his dice as for his drink, and left them side by side... It's interesting how much dice and ice sound alike when you shake them! Fortunately the glass was mostly empty of liquid... but I digress.)

Worked well for most of us, but not so much for "Red". He was very enthusiastic with his dice, and would give them a good shake in his hand, then sort of slam-dunk them down into the glass. The problem being, the top of a glass is not as large a target as "Red" needed it to be! Having one of the dice escape, sometimes to go bouncing across the room, sometimes to go skittering across the game board, was such a common occurrence that we gave it its own name:

"Eric-itis".
laugh
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47. Board Game: Ker Plunk [Average Rating:4.81 Overall Rank:10726]
Adam Slape
United States
Collinsville
Illinois
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Off-the-Table Guy

I had to look twice because I can't believe this hasn't been mentioned yet. There are some people who just can't seem to keep the dice on the table, no matter how many times you have to pick them up and yell at them. Every time their turn comes around, you know there's going to be at least one re-roll. And God forbid you didn't establish whether or not there should be re-rolls for dice falling off the table, because if it's a good roll they're going to keep the number that comes up. shake
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48. Board Game: Warhammer 40,000 [Average Rating:6.35 Overall Rank:1711]
Antti Karjalainen
Finland
Tampere
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Zen-and-the-Single-Die

This is my brother, who is considered an overally lucky roller. The dice issue is not with him, but with the rest of us having to witness his "Zen".

This happens in games that have you rolling buckets o' dice, such as Warhammer 40K. When the Zen-guy rolls fistfuls of dice, the results are avarage or slightly above avarage. Nothing to groan about there.

It is only when the Zen guy has to roll a single D6 or a 2D6 (usually in a game deciding moment) that his mojo kicks in. It might be a morale roll of 3 or less on a 2d6 to save an important unit, a to-hit roll of 6 on a D6 to kill an opposing general...

Or 30+ consecutive saving throws to dodge the fire power of an entire army attacking his leader - during a single turn! shake

I saw it happen...

He. Can. NOT. Fail. A. Friggin. Roll!
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49. Board Game: I Am NOT a Communist [Average Rating:3.60 Unranked]
Christopher Onstad
United States
Donald
Oregon
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The Distributer

Other than spinning, I have noticed this is one of my biggest dice sins. In games with Large quantities of dice. Last Night on Earth, Risk, Mwahahaha, Nexus OPs, etc. I am constantly redistributing the dice. Making sure that everyone has access to an equal number of dice, to make sure everything is fare. It's a sickness, and probably annoying, but there you go.
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