That's just wrong
Brian Morris
United States
Raytown
Missouri
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2nd, 6th and 7th Wisconsin, 19th Indiana, 24th Michigan
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This list is about those moments in gaming where something happens that just isn't right. Now I'm not talking about this in a negative way like cheating, rule loopholes or things of that nature. I'm talking about those wonky moments in games. The moments where you think "that's just wrong" and then laugh. You'll see what I am talking about. Feel free to add your own that's just wrong moments.
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1. Board Game: Agricola: Gamers' Deck [Average Rating:7.88 Unranked] [Average Rating:7.88 Unranked]
Brian Morris
United States
Raytown
Missouri
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2nd, 6th and 7th Wisconsin, 19th Indiana, 24th Michigan
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Not a huge euro guy but I love Agricola. Played it with the new G Deck this past weekend and got the card "Animal Farm". In effect that card allows you to use one of your animals to act like a family member for that turn. Basically you take one of your animals and place it on an action space.

So this weekend we're playing Agricola with the new G Deck and I get Animal Farm. I play it and use it to place a sheep on the family growth space. There's silence at the table and then my friend goes "That's just wrong".
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2. Board Game: Jambo [Average Rating:7.10 Overall Rank:330] [Average Rating:7.10 Unranked]
Brian Morris
United States
Raytown
Missouri
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A game my wife enjoys (There aren't a lot of those). The first time we played it we had one of those wrong moments. I had just scored a bunch of points and my cart was empty. My wife was taking great care to build up her market stall so she could score off several cards. I got the Elephant card. If you haven't played this game the elephant card basically means an elephant just ran through the market knocking everyone's stock all over the place. In effect all items from both player's market stalls go into the center of the table and they then take turns picking one item at a time and putting it in their stall.

So of course with my stall empty and my wife's stall full you can see what's coming. I played the card and when it was over we both had half full stalls. I look at my wife who is staring at me and say "Well, everything that was in my stall is back". She simply says very quietly "thief". Later that night I had some Oreos (the last in the house) and milk at my computer. I get up for a minute and return only to find half my Oreos missing. I look over at my wife who's on the couch and ask her about them. She replies "There was this elephant..."
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3. Board Game: Circus Maximus [Average Rating:6.70 Overall Rank:1163]
Brian Morris
United States
Raytown
Missouri
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This "That's just wrong" moment happened a long time ago. If you haven't played this game here's a run down. This is a game that's half horse race half destruction derby. Your chariot can literally be destroyed and you end up being dragged behind it like a sack of potatoes resulting in a rather nasty and eventually terminal case of road rash. However you don't need your chariot to win and in theory you could be dragged across the finish line for the victory...which is what was going to happen one game for us.

My friend was in the lead but had a rather beat up chariot which finally gives out on him right at the finish line. So here he is on the brink of victory and a nice close up of the race track as he's pulled along on the ground by his race team. All he has to do is cross the finish line next turn. I had enough movement to get behind him but not enough on the next turn to beat him. Did I mention that you have to be alive to win? I ran up behind him and had just enough movement to put my team of horses right on top of him. Basically he didn't have to worry about that road rash next turn. It was literally a case of the thrill of victory and the agony of da hoofs.
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4. Board Game: DungeonQuest (third edition) [Average Rating:6.71 Overall Rank:894]
Tim
United States
San Antonio
Texas
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Appropriate timing. I was playing a little DQ last night... My route to the Dragon's Lair was plagued with impassable chambers, so I was forced to find my way toward an un-explored exit.

As the sun started to set, and the Dungeon exits began to seal shut... (notice the time tracker) -- well, a picture is worth a thousand words.




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5. Board Game: Junta [Average Rating:6.82 Overall Rank:656]
Michael Hovan
United States
Elkhart
Indiana
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This is a game full of negotiation, intrigue, assassination, outright theft, coups, and other assorted forms of mayhem. In short, there is a president (decided by vote of the players and changeable at nearly any moment) who has a cabinet (the other players). The president draws money cards, keeps them hidden, and declares a budget (how much he is going to give the other players). Everyone then votes on the budget - there are cards which allow for more votes than players in the game.

If you kill someone, you get their money. At the end of each turn, each player has the option to start a coup. Victory is determined by how much money you have put into your swiss bank account rather than how much money you have in pocket. You are allowed to hide your pocket money. Swiss bank account money is shown as a stack on the table with the values not showing.

I became president through some sort of villainy (led the coup against the previous president). A new president has the option to kill any one player (and then take their pocket money - dead does not eliminate from the game). Well, the old president had a decent pile of pocket money as she had not yet made it to the swiss bank to make a deposit. However, another player had been selling his soul to everyone at the table to collect money and he had not made it to the swiss bank for deposit either.

I surprised everyone by killing him and taking his money instead of her (the previous president). I then immediately resigned before the coup against me could start. Oh, I was heinous, not handing out much money and lying about how much I kept for myself AND got it all deposited. I even managed to get the money taken from the offed player into the bank before the end of the turn.

We still laugh about this little move. It was the first game for all of us except for the guy teaching us. I won by $1 (million - smallest denomination) because of that move. The previous president to me was second. She couldn't yell at me because we were still all laughing so longly and loudly.

This game is much better than Diplomacy. Thanks for letting me remember and share.
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6. Board Game: Battlestar Galactica [Average Rating:7.83 Overall Rank:29]
Brian Morris
United States
Raytown
Missouri
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A great "That's just wrong" game. My favorite I've experienced in this one happened when I was a Cylon (no surprise). I had the Cylon card where when I revealed I got to shoot someone. It was the turn before mine with that player being a longtime friend. I knew my time was running out but wanted one last bite of the apple. I convinced my friend that someone else was a Cylon and that we needed to put them in the brig. It was a hard negotiation that resulted in the person getting put in the Brig barely.

So the cards are counted and my friend picks up the convicted party and puts him in the brig. He looks at me and of course he could tell by the smile creeping across my face what was coming. He started laughing and goes "You bastard". I of course revealed and added insult to injury (or injury to insult) by shooting him.
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7. Board Game: Catan [Average Rating:7.35 Overall Rank:165]
Wendell
United States
temporarily Arlington VA
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... so long story short, Brad says "I'm telling you, I've got wood for sheep," and everybody said, "That's just wrong!"
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8. Board Game: Die Fugger [Average Rating:6.48 Overall Rank:1931]
Darrin Williams
United States
Allen
Texas
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German pronunciation is not our strong point at my gaming group, but we can do a mean Samuel L Jackson impersonation.

This game title brings out the worst in us.
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9. Board Game: Galaxy Trucker [Average Rating:7.51 Overall Rank:85]
David
United States
San Antonio
Texas
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Galaxy Trucker is full of those moments. Like when the mission starts with two slavers that wipe everybody out, or when the new player builds a terrible ship but puts indestructible armor on the 8 spot and then you roll nothing but 8s, totally demolishing all of the well-built veteran ships.

I like the misery of Galaxy Trucker and it's so much better than I can do it without direct confrontation. But the other day we were playing with the bonus cards and one came up that allowed the high bidder to pick a spot and destroy that component on all ships. So I bid crazy high and found that the leader's beautiful ship had a well protected internal weakness that caused all of his engines to be destroyed. Sure enough, an Open Space came up and his ship was lost. I felt so dirty. I'll probably remove those cards for the future.
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10. Board Game: Diplomacy [Average Rating:7.09 Overall Rank:362]
David
United States
San Antonio
Texas
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Because of this I haven't played Diplomacy in fifteen years.

The mid game was coming to an end and I took a stab at winning by issuing a horrible backstab against my game-long partner. It was devastating and he had no chance.

Meanwhile across Europe, France had an amazing turn and became a giant. The only possible way to stop him was for me to re-ally with my ex-partner the very next turn after I stabbed him. Somehow he agreed and we were able to take a stalemate line to force a draw with France.

To get him to ally back with me I had to eat so much crow that I haven't been able to play Diplomacy since.
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11. Board Game: BANG! [Average Rating:6.62 Overall Rank:723]
Sicaria Occaeco
United States
Salt Lake City
Utah
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Banging your cousin while her husband turns around and starts banging you out of revenge is just wrong.
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12. Board Game: Doggie Doo [Average Rating:4.73 Overall Rank:10841]
Jody Morgan
United States
Fancy Gap
Virginia
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The theme of the game is... odd enough, but the sounds the dog makes, well, "That's just wrong."
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13. Board Game: Cranium [Average Rating:5.74 Overall Rank:4164]
Whitney S
United States
Seattle
Washington
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A few years ago, I was playing Cranium with my husband, parents, and brother. It was my dad's turn to sculpt with the clay.

He starts making something very phallic-looking and wiggling it around. We're stifling some laughter and guessing things like "Sausage?" "Mushroom?"

No, no, that's not it at all. He starts constructing a second structure that resembles a doughnut. Eyebrows start to raise. . .he's not going to, is he?. . .and then he holds the doughnut and moves the sausage in and out repeatedly. We all completely lose it and it takes minutes for anyone to recover.

I wish I could remember what the clue actually was! I can't even guess now because my dad's the type of Pictionary/Cluzzle/etc. player who would sculpt a moon for the clue "cow" and say, "It's because the cow jumps over the moon! Get it?"
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14. Board Game: Betrayal at House on the Hill [Average Rating:7.10 Overall Rank:334]
Tristan Dyer
Australia
Adelaide
South Australia
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Our groups "thats just wrong" moment:

When the traitor, 62 year old Father Rhinehardt, was chasing down 12 year old Brandon Jaspers, who also happened to have the young girl companion omen card.

Needless to say, lots of laughs and rarely does anyone pick Father Rhinehardt anymore.
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15. Board Game: Crokinole [Average Rating:7.81 Overall Rank:39]
Michael Caraway
United States
Kansas City
Missouri
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Broke out the crokinole game the other night. It was me and my significant other playing against my parents who are in their mid 60's.

Of course, I was dominating with my amazing skill and talent whistle which was causing our team to win most of the time. After a particularly amazing (read lucky) ricochet shot, my girlfriend giddily blurts out, "You are so amazing with your finger!"

Yes....... dead silence, followed quickly by uproarious laughter.laugh I have never seen so many shades of red on one face in my life! blush

Quite a fun evening playing a great game!
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16. Board Game: Catan [Average Rating:7.35 Overall Rank:165]
Christian Link
United States
Snowmass Village
Colorado
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1)"I've got wood for your sheep."
2)What color is the robber again?
3)After I'm robbed, I become the robber?
4)Anyone seen my "knihgt"? (pronounced "ka-nig-at"; old misprint for knights?)

...ad infintum...
I still love Settlers of Catan
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17. Board Game: Battletech Introductory Box Set [Average Rating:7.65 Overall Rank:846]
Joey Konyha
United States
Terrytown
Louisiana
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Played this on the computer against a mediocre AI. During the game, I had a mech fire all its weapons at another AI mech. I was just fooling around with the game, kind of to see what would happen. One of my "weapons" was a pod or homing beacon (iNARC) that was used in conjunction with a certain missile system. At the end of each turn, the program gave a breakdown of the action in regards to the weapon fire. I noted the pod was attached to the head. The dumb thing was, I picked random mechs, and did not know too much about them as far as which mech had which weapons, and as it turned out, none of the mechs had the missiles for the system, so the beacon was kind of a silly thing. Thought little of it till the weapon fire for the next turn was resolved. I was so amazed at what happened, I had to look in the rule book (Total Warfare) to see if it was even possible what I had just witnessed. The rule is that a mech can try to "brush off" the pod in order to remove the homer. Trouble was, if you missed the attempt, it was as if you punched yourself in that location, and physical attacks are pretty brutal. So, I destroyed a mech by hitting it with the becon, making it punch itself in the face, and killed the mech's pilot.
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18. Board Game: Zooloretto [Average Rating:6.90 Overall Rank:438] [Average Rating:6.90 Unranked]
Andrew Knaack
United States
La Jolla
California
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The money action of "discard 1 tile."
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19. Board Game: Catan [Average Rating:7.35 Overall Rank:165]
United States
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Sometimes in settlers (ok a lot of the time) one resource gets a lot of bad numbers and becomes scarce. This game stone was very hard to get and one guy had like 3 pieces of it. On his turn he decides to cash in on its high demand and offers to trade it away and got at least 2 resources for each piece netting him at least one new settlement. After the frenzied bidding he then plays the monopoly card and takes all the stone back.
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20. Board Game: Last Night on Earth: The Zombie Game [Average Rating:7.10 Overall Rank:351] [Average Rating:7.10 Unranked]
♪ Isaäc Bickërstaff ♫
United States
Greer
South Carolina
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Entropy Seminar:
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The results of a five yeer studee ntu the sekund lw uf thurmodynamiks aand itz inevibl fxt hon shewb rt nslpn raq liot.
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There's a session report buried somewhere in this game entry about a group of humans who survived the "Get to the Truck!" scenario by chucking the little girl out of the back of the truck to lure the zombies away while the rest of them escaped safely.
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21. Board Game: Catan [Average Rating:7.35 Overall Rank:165]
Claudine Finlay
United States
Herriman
Utah
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Sorry, one more Catan story. We were playing with a couple that learned the game from friends who had slightly altered the rules. The wife of the couple turns to my friend and says, "I want to access your port". Awkward silence, then my friend says, "we don't play that way"
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22. Board Game: Stone Age [Average Rating:7.65 Overall Rank:50]
Keith S.
United States
Dallas/Fort Worth
Texas
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Where to begin...

- "OK, I'm gonna use one of my tools..."

- Ever notice that the five people you have to start with are the only options for mating within your tribe? wow

- On a related note, you're building all these huts, there's a nice big forest to get lost in, etc etc, yet there's only one place to have sex in the entire game, and ALL the tribes use it. gulp

- And what is up with 2 people going into the love hut and bringing back a fully-grown child in 5 minutes? surprise

- From a more practical standpoint, ever send 3 guys to the gold fields and come up empty-handed, when the person who only sent 1 gets the gold?

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23. Family: Dominion
Christopher Davis
United States
Cambridge
Massachusetts
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"I'm turning my Bishop into a Harem." (using Remodel)
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24. Board Game: Field Hospital [Average Rating:7.35 Unranked]
Greg Lam
United States
Boston
Massachusetts
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I played this new game at the last BGGcon and enjoyed it aside from a morbidly amusing quirk.

You're all medics at a field hospital during a war. Soldiers come in all states of distress, from at death's door to somewhat wounded and you must cure them. Every injury will worsen over time until they die or until a medic musters the right resource combination to cure them. The medic who cures the most soldiers with some category bonuses wins. While they'll all die if not treated, some will linger a while and others won't last another turn.

There is absolutely no incentive to save the mortally wounded about to die soldier in favor of the guy suffering a minor injury who would last a while if not treated.

Time for a house rule.
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25. Board Game: Linq [Average Rating:6.87 Overall Rank:1357]
Manchuwok
Canada
Mission
BC
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I was playing a 7 player game of this (underrated) party game. In each of the 7 rounds, 2 of the 7 players are randomly and secretly paired as partners. After 6 rounds, shockingly my brother- and sister-in-law have been partners 3 times. This is highly improbable.

For the last round, we all make a big show of checking their words to see if they could be partners. It's a big running joke already. However, their words are completely unrelated and there are more obvious choices on the board. When we count down for everyone to point at the same time, we are deafened by their screams of joy as we see them pointing at themselves and each other (with nobody else actually pointing at the two of them).

They were immediately banned from all future games of Linq.
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