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BoardGameGeek» Forums » Gaming Related » Gaming with Kids

Subject: New Arrival rss

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Kevin Anthony-Duricko
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Hey All,

So, I might as well introduce this thread with a bit of context. My wife and I are expecting our first child to arrive very soon. The estimated due date is 5th September though it's likely she'll arrive much sooner than that (we have confirmed it's a girl).

I just wanted to ask fellow gamers who became parents how such a monumental change affected your hobby? My wife and I are both keen board gamers and I'm fully expecting our gaming habits to be dramatically curtailed by our little bundle of joy - but to what extent?

Thanks for any input
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Billy McBoatface
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Well, the main thing is that for the first year it will be hard for you both to get away from the baby at once. If your game group is OK with you bringing the baby, then that won't be a problem, otherwise you won't be able to go to the game group together.

Also, your time away alone will be very limited, so you and/or your wife might not game at all.

But it gets better. As the kids get older, they're easier to leave with babysitters and they play more games with you...so just tough out the first few years and you'll be fine.
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April W
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First off, congratulations!

After having our first child my husband and I have to do nearly all of our gaming after she goes to bed now that she is old enough to snatch the pieces. We have become very fond of two player games. Often at parties on the weekends we attempt to play games in groups but can almost never play at the same time (one has to watch the kid while the other plays). For us this has really been the best solution: game apart while away from home, game together at home after she's in bed. I'm looking forward to the day when she will play games with us!
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Dave Eisen
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Cut completely the first few months, with the exception of teaching the boy Splendor on the day he was born.

Eased back in after that, was quite exciting to go to my first Games Day even if I couldn't go to the whole thing. It helps that my wife is both tremendous as a human being and has little interest in gaming herself, even though I did meet her at a gaming event.

The boy is now 17 months old.

My wife ends up preferring me going to events in the evening to those on the weekend because a weekend event costs me an entire day with the boy and the evening events just means she needs to do bedtime on her own. I go out to the weekly game night every couple of weeks, I do my monthly Games Day every month, although sometimes only part of the day. I resumed hosting my regular home event at about 2 months old and that works pretty well, although I do occasionally have to pause the game and go deal with something involving screaming. No ad hoc gaming at all as my life has moved to requiring everything to be planned in advance.

When we have a large gathering over (we like to host), it works way better when we also get a babysitter to be in the house with us for the day. This was not available for the first year or so as we did not have a good handle on how to get babysitters nor did we trust anyone with our baby.

I skipped my first Gathering. I've been to BGG.CON and the second Gathering since.

So, big picture: A significant reduction in my gaming, but still a fair amount. And it does cause tension in the family but as I said above, my wife is tremendous. I look forward to the boy enjoying my games at a level beyond "choking hazard".

Congratulations.
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Kevin Anthony-Duricko
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Soleia wrote:
First off, congratulations!

After having our first child my husband and I have to do nearly all of our gaming after she goes to bed now that she is old enough to snatch the pieces. We have become very fond of two player games. Often at parties on the weekends we attempt to play games in groups but can almost never play at the same time (one has to watch the kid while the other plays). For us this has really been the best solution: game apart while away from home, game together at home after she's in bed. I'm looking forward to the day when she will play games with us!

Thanks, April! Glad to hear that it's still possible even with a squawking newborn
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Hastings
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Soleia wrote:
First off, congratulations!

After having our first child my husband and I have to do nearly all of our gaming after she goes to bed now that she is old enough to snatch the pieces. We have become very fond of two player games. Often at parties on the weekends we attempt to play games in groups but can almost never play at the same time (one has to watch the kid while the other plays). For us this has really been the best solution: game apart while away from home, game together at home after she's in bed. I'm looking forward to the day when she will play games with us!


+1 thumbsup

A huge congratulations to you both for increasing your player count
my little girls birthday is the 8th Sept 2014 (Sept babies are great) and we have another on the way too.

I agree with everything April and Billy have said. Gaming was none existent for the first month - so was sleep but Im sure you'll be fine....after time. snore snore I mean apart from that, we went for the whole routine style of parenting and bottle feeding (I don't want to discuss why) so I can only speak from that perspective.

It was fine after 2/3 months and whilst she was under 7/8months because we were not OVER exhausted all the time at most she could be sit up or wriggling around and just needed toys and things to engage in and so whilst our gaming was reduced a lot we could still have a few games. Also whilst she is small we could travel easily and still keep to sleeping/ eating/ pooping routine. When she became 1 she could walk independently (although this is considered quite quick) this meant that we really could only play after she was in bed.

We can leave her with a babysitter (close friends) or grandparents to go to games group/cafe but thats it going out. We do go out to friends and let her fall asleep and put her down in another room in a bed (she's 21 months and in a bed anyway). We look forward to our evenings a lot whistle

edit: dave beat me to it but completely agree with him too.


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Nathanael Robinson
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Congratulations! I hope the three of you will be healthy and happy.

There seems to be a broad range of experiences, but I would recommend that you set your expectations low. In the months following my son's birth, my wife was hospitalized twice, once for a work accident that greatly reduced her mobility. During those times, I was doing the work of two people. And when she was healthy, she still felt overwhelmed, not being all that interested in games of any sort.

Try to be attentive to your wife's wishes. Ask her what she wants to do, leaving it open whether that will be a game or curling up in front of the TV. Unless you need light two-player games, I'd recommend curtailing most of your conspicuous consumption in order to avoid giving your wife the notion that you will want to play something heavy or learn something new. If you have a game group, be prepared to bail. And get something that can be played solo.
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Allie Tyndall
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Congratulations!

Lots of advice already given, all I would say is, keep your expectations low!

After my lad was born there was something on tv I fancied watching - this was in the days before pausing live telly and on demand services by the way- and I found that even when everything baby- related allowed me the time to watch, my brain was so totally scrambled I couldn't even understand it!
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Liga Bethere
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Our little girl is now 8 months old. For the first 2-3 months we didn't play board games at all, it was just easier to watch some TV show when we wanted to rest.

But later on when we got to regular evening schedule and moreover realized that baby preferred to go to sleep quite early (7-8 PM) we realized we have quite a lot of time for gaming again So usually during one of daily naps I set up some game, then in the evening while I put baby to sleep my husband prepares dinner, and then we quickly eat and then play some board game. However this means that we limit ourselves to 1-1.5 hour games.

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Jay Sears
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I just had a new born 10 days ago and I can tell you that the baby takes over. They need a lot of attention and my wife is constantly nagging I stop designing board games and spend more time with the baby, who...wait for it.....just sleeps!!!

While my wife sleeps, I sneak away and start designing. If I get asked questions I dig out a game I am working on with my daughter who is 4 and say, well I'm doing this for her - although if she hears that she expects it finished that day, hence why I have been working on this.
 
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Robert Osterman
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So we're at this wedding you see, and they ask us to all write down "date night ideas" for the new couple. They're supposed to go on these little popsicle sticks and then in a jar and then the newlyweds will never run out of date ideas!

And my wife and I look at each other and laugh, like, hysterically. One waiter actually asked if we wanted some coffee to help take the edge off all the alcohol we had ~obviously~ imbibed.

We can't remember the last time we sat and said "so, what do you want to do tonight?"/ "I don't know, let's plan a date!" Because, once you have kids, that is ALL over.

I mean, honestly, parenting is so radically different from not parenting that my best advice is not to worry too much about how much life has changed with the inclusion of a kid. That's like trying to enumerate the differences between an egg and a chicken. Sure one leads to the other but yeah... there it ends.

As a geek parent/ gamer dad, I would suggest that you still focus on having "me time", be it with a baby sitter you trust (aunts, uncles, and grandparents are ideal if you have access) or doing the tag team night out (I go out on Wednesdays, Tuesdays are your day).

It's a ride, mate. Just strap in and smile.


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Nathanael Robinson
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Quote:
That's like trying to enumerate the differences between an egg and a chicken. Sure one leads to the other but yeah... there it ends.


I must remember that one.
 
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Hastings
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MrOsterman wrote:


It's a ride, mate. Just strap in and smile.


I really wasn't paying enough attention when people said it was a lot of work but now my almost two years old makes life quite exciting surprise

I love the phrase, it's exactly right. There's no guaranteed guidebook and it really does get crazy sometimes.
 
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Robert Osterman
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Chief0101 wrote:
MrOsterman wrote:


It's a ride, mate. Just strap in and smile.


I really wasn't paying enough attention when people said it was a lot of work but now my almost two years old makes life quite exciting surprise

I love the phrase, it's exactly right. There's no guaranteed guidebook and it really does get crazy sometimes.


Au contraire!

https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Owners-Manual-Instructions-Troub...

https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Owners-Manual-Steve-Bedwell-eboo...

I used to keep a couple copies of the second one in my desk at work for baby presents when I heard someone in the building was expecting.
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Hastings
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MrOsterman wrote:
Chief0101 wrote:
MrOsterman wrote:


It's a ride, mate. Just strap in and smile.


I really wasn't paying enough attention when people said it was a lot of work but now my almost two years old makes life quite exciting surprise

I love the phrase, it's exactly right. There's no guaranteed guidebook and it really does get crazy sometimes.


Au contraire!

https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Owners-Manual-Instructions-Troub...

https://www.amazon.com/Baby-Owners-Manual-Steve-Bedwell-eboo...

I used to keep a couple copies of the second one in my desk at work for baby presents when I heard someone in the building was expecting.


You know what I mean

So we had a similar book which was pretty humorous, (although I don't advocate a standard style because each parent needs to find what works for them, but we liked ours and it gave us the basics we needed).

You really do get dropped in the deep end after the childbirth, especially with the first one.
 
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Robert Osterman
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Chief0101 wrote:


So we had a similar book which was pretty humorous, (although I don't advocate a standard style because each parent needs to find what works for them, but we liked ours and it gave us the basics we needed).



I will probably be opening a can of worms here but we kept the Sears book strictly for the comic elements. Of particular delight was the section about "returning to work" and how easy it was to "just take your baby to work with you"! After all coworkers are happy to care for an infant while you see patients, and it's such a joy to the entire office to have a smiling newborn face there all day!

whistle

It really left us longing for a job where that was even a consideration....
 
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Nathanael Robinson
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MrOsterman wrote:
Chief0101 wrote:


So we had a similar book which was pretty humorous, (although I don't advocate a standard style because each parent needs to find what works for them, but we liked ours and it gave us the basics we needed).



I will probably be opening a can of worms here but we kept the Sears book strictly for the comic elements. Of particular delight was the section about "returning to work" and how easy it was to "just take your baby to work with you"! After all coworkers are happy to care for an infant while you see patients, and it's such a joy to the entire office to have a smiling newborn face there all day!

whistle

It really left us longing for a job where that was even a consideration....


My son comes with me sometimes when I lecture, and even at ten he can be a handful. Once when I was not looking, he started putting up better images of WWI, because the one's I picked were boring. The students giggled until I realized what was going on.
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Hastings
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Bad Thoughts wrote:
MrOsterman wrote:
Chief0101 wrote:


So we had a similar book which was pretty humorous, (although I don't advocate a standard style because each parent needs to find what works for them, but we liked ours and it gave us the basics we needed).



I will probably be opening a can of worms here but we kept the Sears book strictly for the comic elements. Of particular delight was the section about "returning to work" and how easy it was to "just take your baby to work with you"! After all coworkers are happy to care for an infant while you see patients, and it's such a joy to the entire office to have a smiling newborn face there all day!

whistle

It really left us longing for a job where that was even a consideration....


My son comes with me sometimes when I lecture, and even at ten he can be a handful. Once when I was not looking, he started putting up better images of WWI, because the one's I picked were boring. The students giggled until I realized what was going on.


laugh Sounds like a professor in the making. laugh
Yeah, I wont be taking my little girl to work, I can just imagine her running of to play 'hide and seek' in our massive building that's pretty much open plan. Its fine in the house because theres only so many places to hide. But my office is ridiculous, and she is good at that game.

 
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