Any suggestions?

I wont let u within 5 miles of any of them!!!

If you do happen to get my wife and girlfriend round the same table, please don't let on, especially if my sister's there too.

My sweetie and I are always up for a run of The Badger Game.

Here's a link to the rules, so we can start up as soon as you come over:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Badger_game

It's one of our favorites, so we've got all the expansions and variants, too!

Are these newbies or more experienced gamers??

well there is that memory game concentration, hmmm sister? maybe a quick game of castration instead?

The phrasing of this request is just WRONG in so many ways.

best post ever?

Games I've found work well with my wife:

Battlelore (this one surprised me, although I think it's mainly because of all the fun bits)
Lost Cities (fast and little direct conflict.)
San Juan
Carcassone: The City (again, lots of fun bits, often plays out as co-operatively as it does competitively, which she enjoys.)
Race for the Galaxy (this one worked well, but only after she knew San Juan well.)

Comedy gold folks, comedy gold. Thanks for the Friday afternoon chuckle.

Cheers.

Well, there's always Quest of the Dragonlords!

Here are some links to helpful recommendations about 2-player games:

http://www.boardgamegeek.com/article/2288574
http://www.boardgamegeek.com/geeklist/30945
http://www.boardgamegeek.com/geeklist/24727
http://www.boardgamegeek.com/geeklist/19346
http://www.boardgamegeek.com/geeklist/18661
http://www.boardgamegeek.com/geeklist/8691

Feh... My wife plays mind games galore... you're welcome to all of them...

Busen Memo?