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Subject: Engineers, Please... rss

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David Dixon
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Mauldin
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...Stop asking me to do things that are your job and that I'm not qualified to do (or remotely comfortable doing) after the product has already shipped and is now at the customer site, while I'm just trying to get the damn thing working.

Sure, I sold it, but I sold it based on what you told me it could do and because "setting it up is no trouble--just follow the manual and it'll take fifteen minutes, tops." [actual quote]

Just in case you're wondering, the manual (which your department wrote) says nothing about this:



Nor does it say anything about you troubleshooting over the phone by saying: "Huh... Well, it shouldn't be doing that [No shit, Sherlock, that's why I'm calling you on the phone right now]. Just open the cover and all you'll have to do is reprogram the PLC. Just plug digital output 1 [conveniently unlabeled] into one of the spare output channels like 5 or 6 [unlabeled], okay? Can you trace the wires?" [actual quote]

No. That would be your job, okay, Mr. Engineer--I've got a liberal arts degree.

I don't ask you to write papers or talk to people and you don't ask me to reprogram your PLCs.

I thought we'd all been through this in college...

Diis

PS: As an added bonus, tracing the wires is impossible since the folks that wired it wired all the inputs (which are multiple insulated wires inside four different larger insulated conduits) to come together and come up into the control box through one hole in the bottom... so tracing the wires is impossible without basically rewiring all the inputs.





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Celina
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You need a shoulder-mounted camera, so they can see your finger pointing at the wires. "You mean this blue one? Or this blue one? Maybe this blue one?"
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Blorb Plorbst
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Did you try reversing the polarity?
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Jonathan N. "Spartan Spawn, Sworn, Raised for Warring!"
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"By the power of truth, I, while living, have conquered the universe."
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I believe Han, when faced with a similar situation simply shot the comms unit. I think you should do the same...and shoot each subsequent one they bring you.
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J
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That looks like my day job.
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Old & Chaotic Evil Bob
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I see some humor in the image gulp

some of the connectors we labeled with creativity shake

FU622
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FU628

dear customer ...

F U






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HYPERBOLE! It's like the greatest thing ever!!!
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This is simple:

You just switch the wire that says "input" and plug into the area marked "output", then walk to the power supply and attach a new magnet to switch its electron flow. If that doesn't work, turn the power off, then on. If that still doesn't work, look for a four-prong outlet.

Don't they teach you people anything in school these days.
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Andy Andersen
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I'm getting a new computer today. Will somebody please send an engineer?
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Mad Meknik
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Parmelia
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Orangemoose wrote:
I'm getting a new computer today. Will somebody please send an engineer?
Yep, I'm here. What would you like me to blow up today?
(I'm a mining engineer, we blow things up, and then dig big ugly holes in the ground.)
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United States
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HYPERBOLE! It's like the greatest thing ever!!!
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Cringing Dragon wrote:
Orangemoose wrote:
I'm getting a new computer today. Will somebody please send an engineer?
Yep, I'm here. What would you like me to blow up today?
(I'm a mining engineer, we blow things up, and then dig big ugly holes in the ground.)

Well, I'm thinking of getting this shiny new Death Star. You wanna come work on it.

Tag, you're it.
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TOKYO Heartbroken
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I am an engineer. (I'm not really, but let's pretend I am for the sake of Chit Chat).

As I said, I am an engineer. I have looked at the supplied photo and apart from the obvious fact that everything single thing there is extensively and clearly labelled, I also notice quite distinctly that the OK light is lit green.

Clearly then, it is OK. I suggest you spend less time on Keats, Proletarian Folk Tales From 18C Russia and Dystopian Fiction and more time reading the bloody manual.
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fightcitymayor
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Turn it off and turn it back on again.

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Mark Finch
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EYE of NiGHT wrote:
I have looked at the supplied photo and apart from the obvious fact that everything single thing there is extensively and clearly labelled, I also notice quite distinctly that the OK light is lit green.


It's a PLC, so the only components that are actually labelled are those that the mechanical engineers think important i.e the primitive crap that alters the voltage to this or actuates that, and instantly breaks the moment you expose it to any technology developed post 1985.

The LAN connections you'll notice are unlabelled; ME guys don't understand Ethernet and don't regard it as any way important. A LAN to them just means unnecessary upstream systems. Not for them the hairy-fairy world of production control, job scheduling, error correction and - God forbid - kaizen. Also the 100Mbps indicators are not green, they're amber: doubtless this crapheap is actually connected at 10Mbps with (very probably) a duplex mismatch to boot.

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TOKYO Heartbroken
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MFinch wrote:
Also the 100Mbps indicators are not green, they're amber:


Exsqueeze me! I think you'll find that the unit is powered by a SOLA SDP-4-24-100RT PSU, which has a GREEN light next the the letters O and K, meaning everything is OK.
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John Culp
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Cringing Dragon wrote:
Orangemoose wrote:
I'm getting a new computer today. Will somebody please send an engineer?
Yep, I'm here. What would you like me to blow up today?
(I'm a mining engineer, we blow things up, and then dig big ugly holes in the ground.)


oh! me too!
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United States
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Calm down. Walk toward the server controlling the router and turn it off. Now, look for the one marked "Domain Name Service" and turn it off. Seek out the SQL server and put a bullet into it about square in the middle. Now, find all the MicroSoft products and burn them. The find each computer's DOS Prompt and type, "format C:\" and press ENTER; then, when it asks if you're sure, type "Y" and and again press ENTER. This is really all so simple, a child could do it.

Now, if you can find the ".COM" master Domain Name Server and blow it to kingdom come, everyone's life will be better.
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Mike Adams
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It's National Engineering Week so I figured this would be a thread extolling the many wonderful contributions engineers make to society, as it should be. Come on and celebrate already! And by "celebrate" obviously I mean "worship us".
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Mark Finch
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EYE of NiGHT wrote:
MFinch wrote:
Also the 100Mbps indicators are not green, they're amber:


Exsqueeze me! I think you'll find that the unit is powered by a SOLA SDP-4-24-100RT PSU, which has a GREEN light next the the letters O and K, meaning everything is OK.


Bah, thwarted in my attempts at remote diagnostics. Damn you, OK LED!

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Adrian Layden
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You got mains cables in the same ducting as signal cables, it's obviously a noise problem.

Ur welcome.
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FEB
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It's all witchcraft anyway !
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Zé Mário
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I'm an engineer and I'm pretty sure I know as much about that as an art major.
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United States
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HYPERBOLE! It's like the greatest thing ever!!!
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If you want an Operating System with balls, avoid UNIX ...
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Karl Fritz
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Lemme guess.. You were hired because you have people skills. You are good at dealing with people..
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J
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jmilum wrote:
That looks like my day job.

oh, and I would take a picture, but I'm not allowed. Just had refresher training this morning and again they said no cameras, no camera phones, no sketches...
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Matt Riddle
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I engineer tanks. but my stuff works, promise.
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