Games in Songs
Rob Robinson
England
Rotherham
South Yorkshire
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I fight lost wars, see light, fear sight
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I open my mind, need flesh, fear mine
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What songs have lyrics that mention/feature particular boardgames?
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1. Board Game: Scrabble [Average Rating:6.29 Overall Rank:1504]
Rob Robinson
England
Rotherham
South Yorkshire
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Apparently these rules/lyrics were found Inside the lid of an old Spear's Games Scrabble box. Suddenly it all makes sense, in a dada sort of way. Under RULES FOR PLAYING SCRABBLE it says in small letters TRADE MARK.

The song is 'My Trademark' by 'Cardiacs'.

Scoring blank is zero plus
Premium letters conspicuous
A light red square is trebled when
A player completes his turn and then

Standard dictionary score
Farm horn bit paste bit farm horn
Two blank tiles complete the word
Requiring hyphens a player can see

When two or more words are formed in the same play
(See examples, Turn 3 and Turn 4 below)
At the end of the game each players score
Is reduced by the sum of his

Rules for playing to begin
Rules for playing to begin
Rules for playing to begin
Farm horn paste
Farm horn paste mob

When two or more words are formed in the same play
(See examples, Turn 3 and Turn 4 below)
At the end of the game each players score
Is reduced by the sum of his.
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2. Board Game: Chess [Average Rating:7.09 Overall Rank:414] [Average Rating:7.09 Unranked]
David Heldt
United States
Harper Woods
Michigan
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Two panzer jocks in the South Seas hoping that soon they'll get lei'd--
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Yes - I've Seen All Good People

Lots of Chess references in this song.
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3. Board Game: Scrabble [Average Rating:6.29 Overall Rank:1504]
Phil Alberg
United States
Cumberland
Rhode Island
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Whoopee Doopee, we have fun!
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You lost the game!
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Barenaked Ladies
"Conventioneers", from Maroon

Followed your perfume out away from all the rabble
Right up to your room for a drink and travel Scrabble
You, stationed in the warm glow of the t.v.
Too patient as I'm playing L-O-V-E
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4. Board Game: Monopoly [Average Rating:4.40 Overall Rank:15327]
David Heldt
United States
Harper Woods
Michigan
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Two panzer jocks in the South Seas hoping that soon they'll get lei'd--
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PiL - Public Image

Two sides to every story
Somebody had to stop me
I'm not the same as when I began
It's not a game of Monopoly
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5. Board Game: Risk [Average Rating:5.58 Overall Rank:14509]
Mark Beyak
United States
Santa Rosa
California
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Combat Commander gets your blood flowing.
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Mott the Hoople and the game of Life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andy Kaufman in the wrestling match. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Monopoly, Twenty one, checkers, and chess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mister Fred Blassie in a breakfast mess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Let's play Twister, let's play Risk. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
See you in heaven if you make the list. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

REM - Man on the Moon

Lots of games in this one!
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6. Board Game: Yahtzee [Average Rating:5.29 Overall Rank:15228]
Jim Cote
United States
Maine
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NICK CANNON - "Feelin' Freaky"

We tearin' the club like them boys did in the roxy
Million dollar thug like I'm Ted DiBiase
Crack game on the plain
Probably think its Yahtzee

[I have never heard this song before. I just googled for songs with yahtzee, since I figured there would be at least one.]
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7. Board Game: Risk [Average Rating:5.58 Overall Rank:14509]
Kent Reuber
United States
San Mateo
California
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REM's "Man on the Moon" has lots:

"Mott the Hoople and the Game of Life. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Andy Kaufman in the wrestling match. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Monopoly, twenty one, checkers, and chess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Mister Fred Blassie in a breakfast mess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Let's play Twister, let's play Risk. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
See you in heaven if you make the list. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah"
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8. Board Game: Poker [Average Rating:6.70 Overall Rank:864]
David Heldt
United States
Harper Woods
Michigan
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Two panzer jocks in the South Seas hoping that soon they'll get lei'd--
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Kenny Rogers - The Gambler

You got to know when to hold 'em
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run
You never count your money
When you're sitting at the table
There'll be time enough for counting
When the dealing's done

And yes, I'm ashamed that I know these lyrics--
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9. Board Game: Ticket to Ride [Average Rating:7.46 Overall Rank:124] [Average Rating:7.46 Unranked]
Stephen Carter
United Kingdom
Stockton-on-Tees
Cleveland
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The Beatles - She's got a Ticket to Ride, and she don't care.
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10. Board Game: Poker [Average Rating:6.70 Overall Rank:864]
Stephen Carter
United Kingdom
Stockton-on-Tees
Cleveland
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Electric Light Orchestra - Poker - "The ace, that's hiding up your sleve, will cause the world to grieve"
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11. Board Game: Monopoly Express [Average Rating:5.69 Overall Rank:6910]
Bobby Warren
United States
Glendale
Arizona
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La cheeserie!
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Thin Lizzy
"Jailbreak"

'Like the game, if you lose, go to jail'

Really referring to "Monopoly", but this will do.
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12. Board Game: Pachisi [Average Rating:4.46 Overall Rank:15317]
John Reiners
United States
New York
New York
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Callistan Frank Black

Went in from the weather when I got wheezy
I play some pachinko I play pachisi
And St. Anne is still making it breezy
In the valley of tar that once was L.A.
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13. Board Game: Gnip Gnop [Average Rating:4.73 Overall Rank:14978]
Seth Jaffee
United States
Tucson
Arizona
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Beastie Boys latest album has a song that mentions this game. I don't recall the lyrics offhand. They also reference Scrabble and Boggle a lot in their songs.

Gotta respect three nerdy jewish kids hitting it big in the rap world with lyrics about Star Trek, word games, and poro mags.
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14. Board Game: Dungeons & Dragons Basic Game [Average Rating:6.77 Overall Rank:2191]
John Reiners
United States
New York
New York
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In The Garage Weezer

"I've got a Dungeon Master's Guide
I've got a 12-sided die
I've got Kitty Pryde
And Nightcrawler too
Waiting there for me
Yes I do, I do"

References D&D AND Xmen comics. What a geek!
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15. Board Game: Dungeons & Dragons Basic Game [Average Rating:6.77 Overall Rank:2191]
Seth Jaffee
United States
Tucson
Arizona
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"Rawr Rawr, like a Dungeon Dragon..."

- Busta Rhymes
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16. Board Game: Yahtzee [Average Rating:5.29 Overall Rank:15228]
Adam Glass
United States
Columbus
Ohio
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(Hospital Vespers) -- The Weakerthans
Doctors play your dosage like a card trick
Scrabbled down the hallways yelling "Yatzee"
I brought books on Harper in the Arctic
Something called "The Politics of Lonely"
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17. Board Game: Craps [Average Rating:4.82 Overall Rank:15073]
Chris Malme
United Kingdom
Peterborough
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Snake eyes
Seven eleven
Don't let me down boys
Gimme snake eyes
Seven eleven
Don't let me down tonight
No don't let me down tonight

Snake Eyes - Alan Parsons Project
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18. Board Game: Perquackey [Average Rating:5.98 Overall Rank:7774]
Chris Malme
United Kingdom
Peterborough
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"Oo, Oo, Aha. Do it again, pretty momma.
We'll buy ice-cream. I'll let you treat me.
We'll play Perquacky. I'll let you beat me."

S&M - Dean Friedman
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19. Board Game: Monopoly [Average Rating:4.40 Overall Rank:15327]
jefF, There are some who call me... DuneKitteh
United States
Wood Dale
Illinois
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Dune Kitty really does love you, despite any asshattery.
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Useless rollover, booya! Dune Kitty says, "deal with it."
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"We'll make a man of him, put him to a trade... teach him to play Monopoly and how to sing in the rain."

Jethro Tull - Thick As A Brick
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20. Board Game: Zombies!!! [Average Rating:5.85 Overall Rank:4470] [Average Rating:5.85 Unranked]
Jeff Hobbs
United States
Wylie
Texas
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Rob Zombie - "Living Dead Girl"
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21. Board Game: Magic: The Gathering [Average Rating:7.45 Overall Rank:157] [Average Rating:7.45 Unranked]
adam kouzmanoff
United States
champaign
United States
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"i played hassle the dorkening once
had eighteen cards in my hand, all Muds
and I didn't seem to need a mud card to win
hadn't tapped a Mud yet - then the other kid grinned
see he'd just drawn a batallion of rolling explosions"

Hassle: The Dorkening, by MC Frontalot.
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22. Board Game: Hearts [Average Rating:6.43 Overall Rank:1536]
Miss Jonz
United States
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Playin' with the Queen of Hearts,
You know it isn't really smart.
The joker is the only fool
Who'll do anything for you.

(my apologies to Juice Newton if I have butchered these lyrics...)
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23. Board Game: Risk [Average Rating:5.58 Overall Rank:14509]
Nick Fisk
United Kingdom
Stoke on Trent
Staffordshire
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Come on you Seagulls! Sami Hyppia's Blue & White army!
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That's weird. This bit used to mention Shire Games, and tell you all how wonderful we are. But it seems to have got deleted. Let's see what happens this time ....
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Gonna show my age a bit here ....

We sat around the table and we were eager to start
We made ourselves coffee and we dealt out these cards
Little did I know the time or the date
That this was the evening I decided our fate

My advancing armies were spread all over the map
Things were running quite smoothly when i had a mishap
Just when I though my troops were really well stacked
The neighbouring nation decided to attack - me!

He threw a six and a five and a four
Smash! Went my armies on to the floor
He threw a six and a five and a three
That's when I lost another territory

So he takes his "free move" and his card very smugly
That's when I knew this game was gonna turn ugly
My reinforced troops prepared to advance
This was my moment my chance to fight back

He'd scattered his units only one in Alaska
I caught him out when I came swooping in from Kamchatka!
Brilliant deception my finest of plans
'Cause while he weren't looking I wiped out Japan!

I threw a six and a four and a two
With only one army he could only lose
I threw a six and a six and a five
None of his armies was left alive

It started with dice all jokey and fun
But when it turned nasty we broke out the guns
We'd lost our heads and tempers were running wild
'Cause we'd begun to use those awful nuclear missiles

With heavier losses our emotions did rise
It was then that I noticed only death in his eyes!
I understood as we went on red alert
That this was the devil and he was destroying the earth!

I threw a one and a one and a one
Sweating with horror what had I done?
I threw a nil and a nil and a nil
And now we are delivered unto the devil



Risk by The Spizzles
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24. Board Game: Rock Paper Scissors [Average Rating:4.42 Overall Rank:14525]
Lindsey Dubb
United States
Seattle
Washington
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Hand over fist
Paper around the stone
Scissors cut the paper
Cut the paper to the bone
Hand over fist
Paper around the stone
Scissors cut the paper
And the rock must stand alone

(Rush, Hand Over Fist)
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25. Board Game: Boggle [Average Rating:6.19 Overall Rank:1961]
Kevin H
Canada
Windsor
Ontario
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Beastie Boys - Putting Shame in Your Game

"I'm the king of Boggle there is none higher
I get 11 points off the word quagmire"
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