Uninspiring wedding vows
Brendan Newell
United Kingdom
Manchester
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My girlfriend and I were just having a giggle about the worst wedding vows we could potentially say to each other when we eventually tie the knot.

Here are a few for your enjoyment - feel free to add your own
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1. Board Game: The Okay Card Game [Average Rating:2.00 Unranked]
 
Brendan Newell
United Kingdom
Manchester
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"I met you and things were okay I suppose. I've got to spend my life with someone so you'll probably do. Assuming there's no cheating or major illness along the way..."
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2. Board Game: Clean-Up [Average Rating:0.00 Unranked]
Brendan Newell
United Kingdom
Manchester
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"I reckon I'm okay with that, just keep yourself clean and pay half of everything and I can go along with that...just one thing, no lights on during sex"
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3. Board Game: Divorce [Average Rating:4.00 Unranked]
Brendan Newell
United Kingdom
Manchester
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"I suppose there's a chance I'll get you preggers at some point and I'd never hear the end of it from your family if we weren't married first. I can always divorce you if something better comes along so lets get this done and get back to the TV"
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4. Board Game: Flash Gordon [Average Rating:0.00 Unranked]
Bill Allen
Australia
Ngunnawal, Canberra
ACT
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Have you considered the following from the movie "Flash Gordon"?

Quote:
Zogi, the High Priest: Do you, Ming the Merciless, Ruler of the Universe, take this Earthling Dale Arden, to be your Empress of the Hour?

The Emperor Ming: Of the hour, yes.

Zogi, the High Priest: Do you promise to use her as you will?

The Emperor Ming: Certainly!

Zogi, the High Priest: Not to blast her into space?

[Ming glares at Zogi]

Zogi, the High Priest: Uh, until such time as you grow weary of her.

The Emperor Ming: I do.

Dale Arden: I do NOT!
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5. Board Game: Poisson d'Avril [Average Rating:6.67 Overall Rank:6147]
J Weintraub
United States
Commack
New York
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Honestly, I just asked you as a joke; I never expected you to say yes. But now I feel kinda obligated. Just thought you should know.
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6. Board Game: Eat Poop You Cat [Average Rating:7.49 Overall Rank:738]
Tanner Griffin
United States
Ogden
Utah
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As an ornithologist, George was fascinated by the fact that urine and feces mix in birds’ rectums to form a unified, homogeneous slurry that is expelled through defecation, although eying Greta's face, and sensing the reaction of the congregation, he immediately realized he should have used a different analogy to describe their relationship in his wedding vows.
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