Terrible Real Estate Photos
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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Anyone who has ever bought property knows that the professionals selling the properties are experts on putting great spin on some horrible homes to try to make them sound more desirable. Here are some properties that would present a huge challenge to anyone trying to make them sound good.
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1. Board Game: Luchador! Mexican Wrestling Dice [Average Rating:6.52 Overall Rank:2408]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Furnished. Particularly well-suited to the hosting of competitive staring or arm-wrestling tournaments.’
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2. Board Game: Family Business [Average Rating:6.10 Overall Rank:2425]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Potential buyers are advised not to think about what happens in this room when your back is turned and the light begins to fade.’
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3. Board Game: Bathtub Love [Average Rating:3.00 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Reminiscent of the bathrooms in the Palace of Versailles, if the bathrooms in the Palace of Versailles had been decorated on a tight budget in the 1970s.’
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4. Board Game: Count Your Blessings [Average Rating:5.33 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Of the two options, “bless this house” is the more popular.’
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5. Board Game: Cell [Average Rating:6.33 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Despite the best efforts of the authorities, occassionally an inmate will manage to list his cell on the open market.’
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6. Board Game: American Bar [Average Rating:4.33 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘To ward off potential intruders the owners have put a fully stocked drinks trolly immediately in front of a badly-fitted glass door.
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7. Board Game: The Big Idea [Average Rating:6.33 Overall Rank:2931]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘A rare example of what architectural historians refer to as a “fertility window”.
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8. Board Game: Fire [Average Rating:6.05 Overall Rank:9436]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘On a cold winter’s night, there’s nothing quite like a poorly executed drawing of a log fire.’
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9. Board Game: Fantastic Mr Fox [Average Rating:4.50 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘What does the fox say? It says “I’m the size of a fully grown man, I can stand upright, and I’m not even 100% sure I’m a fox”.’
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10. Board Game: Zombie Survival: The Board Game [Average Rating:5.71 Overall Rank:8812]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘The property has been recently upgraded to withstand the forthcoming zombie apocalypse.’
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11. Board Game: Listening to Nature [Average Rating:0.00 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Despite modernisation, the owners have retained the toilet’s original listening booth – an unusual feature seldom seen nowadays.’
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12. Board Game: Mirror, Mirror [Average Rating:6.04 Overall Rank:9455]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Some people like to read while on the toilet. Others prefer to be inundated by multiple confusing and contradictory reflections of themselves, repeating into infinity.’
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13. Board Game: Garden Competition [Average Rating:6.84 Overall Rank:4107]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Jean-Paul Sartre said “hell is other people”. It is not. Hell is this patio.’
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14. Board Game: Plants [Average Rating:6.30 Unranked]
 
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘The slow death of the remaining pot-plants has been thoroughly enjoyed by the current owners.’
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15. Board Game: Pool Position [Average Rating:5.80 Overall Rank:9988]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘The owners assure us the pool will be dredged before anyone else can move in.’
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16. Board Game: Bridal Shower Pictionary [Average Rating:0.00 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘For a variety of reasons, this is one shower that should be checked thoroughly before use.’
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17. Board Game: The Smurf Game [Average Rating:4.71 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘A tragic scene. This is what happens when a smurf bursts.’
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18. Board Game: King Me! The Toilet [Average Rating:6.50 Unranked] [Average Rating:6.50 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Some awful things must have happened on this toilet for the owners to have erected tidal defences.’
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19. Board Game: Wash & Dry Bingo [Average Rating:7.00 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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‘Never again will you miss a delivery because you were on the toilet’
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20. Board Game: Junk Yard [Average Rating:6.02 Unranked]
John Bandettini
United Kingdom
London
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The agents are quietly confident that a recent missing persons case is on the verge of being solved.
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21. Board Game: Royal Purple the Game of Kings [Average Rating:0.00 Unranked]
Matt Green
England
Horsham
West Sussex
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"...and into a relaxing pastel finished formal dining slash bedroom. now if you'd just like to swallow these codeine capsules, we shall continue"



"Moving on, we come to a colour-matched bathroom...sir, if you could stop screaming for a moment...



...I'd like to show you the master, or rather, 'mistress' bedroom- et voila!"



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22. Board Game: Nuclear Proliferation [Average Rating:6.55 Overall Rank:2577] [Average Rating:6.55 Unranked]
Philip Jelley
United Kingdom
Hungerford
Berkshire
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Isolated fisherman's cottage with sweeping views across some of the most beautiful coastal landscape England has to offer.



Except if you are looking at the nuclear power station next door... whistle

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23. Board Game: Star Trek: Expeditions [Average Rating:6.50 Overall Rank:1969]
Philip Jelley
United Kingdom
Hungerford
Berkshire
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Set phasors to stun for this enterprising apartment wow

Sir is not a Star Trek fan? blush



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