The Broken Meeple - Episode 29 - Top Ten Most Hated Games
Luke Hector
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I need to get back in the habit of posting my Top Ten lists from my podcast online so I will do. Starting now! And boy I'm starting with a controversial one here! I love board games, but occasionally some will come along and just grate me the wrong way. The Dice Tower did a recent Top 10 and I can agree with a lot of what they said. I have a feeling though that a few of my choices will impact more though.

But however, as I always keep saying. My Top 10 lists are purely MY OPINION BASED ON EXPERIENCE and in this case particularly, if you love a game I hate, that's perfectly cool as long as you play the game and enjoy it yourselves. I never hate on anyone for loving a game I hate and vice versa. We are all passionate about the hobby and I love the hobby for that. So therefore I look forward to the debates to come!

And next month on Episode 30 I'm going to do my Top Ten Board Game Surprises where I go over the 10 games which I thought wouldn't wow me but ended up really impressing me. A nice happy episode that will be so I'm balancing this out!!

Anyway, here we go, fresh from Episode 29 - here's my Top 10 Most Hated Games!

http://www.brokenmeeple.blogspot.co.uk/2015/04/episode-29-al...
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1. Board Game: Kingdom Builder [Average Rating:7.01 Overall Rank:450]
Luke Hector
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Ugh...............I have nothing good to say about this game. I wasn't disappointed by it, because I didn't expect much and boy did I receive less than that. Modular boards when it actually means something is fine. Different objectives is fine again when it actually means something. But placing Monopoly houses on a Clipart style board in silly little shapes and arrangements while drawing a hand of ONE card to dictate your game..................ugh. I did a review of this before and nothing has changed since, dull, tedious, boring and theme-less, this is hands down my worst game ever played.................and what on earth is that pink stuff supposed to be, fairy pixie land??
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2. Board Game: Monopoly Deal Card Game [Average Rating:6.26 Overall Rank:1811]
Luke Hector
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What is this? As if the base game isn't bad enough, this game is just a complete luck-fest and a chaotic one at that. You have ZERO control. Draw cards, play cards and hope things go your well. Draw well, you will win, but draw badly you will get hosed down. The only redeeming feature is that it's a short game but otherwise this has no basis being a game! It's just completely pointless and has no care for graphical design. Seems like a blatant cash in on an old franchise!
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3. Board Game: Pirates! Card Game [Average Rating:6.27 Overall Rank:9292]
Luke Hector
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Never play this with more than 4 players. I had to sit through a 6 player game and god, this luck fest of a game took so long, longer than most Euro games and that's just mind boggling in itself. All you do in this game is draw some cards from a deck, choose a ship to attack then roll dice ENDLESSLY AND CONSTANTLY until one ship runs out of crew. That's it. The treasure cards in this game are pointless to go for, ships are always better, but this game just drags on because ship combat takes forever with you having to roll dice equal to your crew and continuing so until one ship loses and when you start with 10-12 crew typically.............ugh...
 
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4. Board Game: Chicago Express [Average Rating:7.23 Overall Rank:362]
Luke Hector
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I'm going to lump pretty much every 18XX game here alongside this but this is basically 18XX lite. A train connection game that just has you start at one end of a map and then connect to various cities while manipulating stocks..............FUN!! No, it's boring as watching paint dry and of the 3 actions you can do in a turn, one of them (develop a track) is so pointless that my first game of this NO-ONE DID IT AT ALL including the owner of the game! So basically you have 2 choices each turn that are meaningful, there's zero theme......it's just DULL, very DULL!
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5. Board Game: Betrayal at House on the Hill [Average Rating:7.10 Overall Rank:423]
Luke Hector
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If you're going to re-print a game, FIX IT!! This game got reprinted and nothing changed. Big mistake! I love Arkham Horror and Eldritch Horror but those are good themed horror games. This is just broken. Pure broken. Cards are completely unbalanced, some scenarios for The Haunting are boring as hell and it's a completely luck-fest again where you spend most of the game just running around rooms searching for stuff. I took an intelligent wise man, got crippled by a dog bite in the first turn, couldn't do jack for the rest of the game, got turned into a voodoo priest and then spent 90 more minutes just randomly choosing a character each turn to get a debuff in which they never worked because the characters had buffs from cards that turned them into gods.................wow...........why do people enjoy this? Broken rules, imbalanced cards and very repetitive dull artwork.
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6. Board Game: Power Grid [Average Rating:7.91 Overall Rank:29]
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Friends of mine would have expected this to be higher, but nope, it's only No 6. But I'm not a fan of auction games anyway with the exception of quick ones like the under-rated Biblios which is a great auction filler game. But Power Grid is as dry as sandpaper and causes so much analysis paralysis with all of the Math-y auctions (and I'm an accountant so don't go saying I can't do Maths) that it drags on endlessly. People take forever to finish bids due to the high values and all you do is place Monopoly houses on a board that rarely even gets fully utilised due to player count that the map location is almost irrelevant.

The only good thing I like which means it's only No.6 is the resource market which is a good mechanic, but put it in a better game that doesn't have an artificial catch up mechanic hidden in the turn order track. I love a lot of Euro games with no theme (Terra Mystica is awesome) but this.............yuck! Never again!
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7. Board Game: Luchador! Mexican Wrestling Dice [Average Rating:6.52 Overall Rank:2409]
Luke Hector
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Luck games with choices are ok - I'm fine with King of Tokyo. But the first edition of this game was just nothing but pure luck. The second edition improved on matters with some unique player moves, but if you look past the gimmicky fighting ring where you roll the dice, in the end it's just another luck fest. Roll the dice and hope you get more hits than the other player has in blocks. Get a super move, hope you get it to land and cripple the opponent in 1-2 hits. And to top it off it spawns players who "ham" it up like crazy talking trash in Mexican Wrestling fashion. Now I will confess I hate wrestling in all forms and Mexican Wrestling especially, so fake and contrived and ridiculous, I can't stand it, but even if you changed the theme, I wouldn't like this.
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8. Board Game: Nuclear War [Average Rating:6.21 Overall Rank:2307] [Average Rating:6.21 Unranked]
Luke Hector
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Draw cards, program cards and just comment on how lots of people die at once..........that's it...........Granted this game came from 1965 so what do I expect, but there's very little to enjoy in this game and it's not even a short time. I barely even remember most of it, it's that forgettable!
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9. Board Game: In the Year of the Dragon [Average Rating:7.40 Overall Rank:221]
Luke Hector
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I like to play Euro games where I build something up and create something. Here you can't because the game beats you down turn after turn relentlessly with no way to build yourself back up.

You might as well call this "In The Year Of The Depressing Game" because nothing ever goes right for you in it. It's generally quite boring and being a Stefan Feld game it's automatically devoid of theme, but that aside, this game just grates me because there's no reason to be satisfied with anything you create because it's destroyed before you can blink an eye. Now it's low on the list and I can see that many people enjoy this game because of the constant beatdown challenge, but I'll go play Caverna instead thanks!
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10. Board Game: Machi Koro [Average Rating:6.70 Overall Rank:741]
Luke Hector
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One of the current hotness games right now. Ok, I understand it's good for families and non-gamers and I can bring myself to sit down and play this, but with gritted teeth. The game is incredibly light and pure luck at the end of the day. Roll dice, hope it comes up with your number and hopefully gain money. Catan is like that yes, but I love Catan because you have several paths to victory with the expansions and you get the fun trading aspect.

Here all you do is buy some cards and hope you roll your number. The End. You might as well roll a die and the highest number wins. And the expansion "Harbour" makes the game even worse! Having the deck randomised drags the game out even longer because you never get enough of the cheaper buildings and the Harbour itself actually breaks the game! For 2 gold you can buy a property which effectively allows you to add 2 to any roll of a 10 or 11 regardless of whether you have anything of 13 or higher in your tableau. So essentially any blue card of 10 or 11 is rendered COMPLETELY WORTHLESS because who is going to stay on 10 if they have no reason to collect money, but you do? Was this game playtested?! I don't know, but maybe this is simply not for me, either way, it just pips the hated list.
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11. Board Game: A Study in Emerald [Average Rating:7.24 Overall Rank:600]
Luke Hector
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Going to add a (dis)honorable mention to the list, call it my Number 11.

Martin Wallace isn't my favourite designer of all time with the style of games, but this one is effectively destroying my beloved Lovecraft franchise by being themeless and convuluted in the secret loyalty thing, to the extent where you can lose the game purely by someone misunderstanding the rules. The downtime with 5 players was far too long, I never felt like I was doing anything Cthlulu related, in fact maybe this is the game that would actually bring the dark lord out from his slumber. . . .
 
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