More Creepy, Romantic Poetry Written to My Board Games (Warning Sexual Imagery Ahead)
Charles Rayburn
United States
Cleveland
Tennessee
flag msg tools
badge
Avatar
mbmbmbmbmb
Recommend
17 
 Thumb up
 tip
 Hide
Yet another edition of seriously disturbing adult poetry by Rowdy Ray. Enjoy!!!

Disclaimer: If you are easily offended, turn away now while there is still time.
Your Tags: Add tags
Popular Tags: [View All]
  • [+] Dice rolls
1. Board Game: Agricola [Average Rating:8.03 Overall Rank:17]
Charles Rayburn
United States
Cleveland
Tennessee
flag msg tools
badge
Avatar
mbmbmbmbmb
In barren fields I feel the need
To often plant my fertile seed

Sometimes when behind the plow
My lustful gaze will find a cow

My desires are strong it's true
Just listen to the heifers moo

To my wife I swear an oath
Tonight we practice family growth

When the wife is fast asleep
I pay a visit to my wooly sheep

The bleating sheep are loud indeed
I stand upon a pile of reed

As sunlight comes I roam once more
I do not disturb the sleeping boar

Exhausted from a busy day
Back toward the house I make my way
2 
 Thumb up
 tip
 Hide
  • [+] Dice rolls
Loading... | Locked Hide Show Unlock Lock Comment     View Previous {{limitCount(numprevitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
{{error.message}}
{{comment.error.message}}
    View More Comments {{limitCount(numnextitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} / {{numnextitems_calculated}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
2. Board Game: Caylus [Average Rating:7.83 Overall Rank:45]
Charles Rayburn
United States
Cleveland
Tennessee
flag msg tools
badge
Avatar
mbmbmbmbmb
As down the castle road I streak,
I often give pretty maids a peek

The bailiff tries to chase me down
But I run from town to town

Flashing people as I go
The workers always get a show

One must know the golden rule:
Never be ashamed to show your tool

Of his tool a worker must be proud
And celebrate it's size with voice so loud

Have no fear, though yours be small
Tools are special, one and all
1 
 Thumb up
 tip
 Hide
  • [+] Dice rolls
Loading... | Locked Hide Show Unlock Lock Comment     View Previous {{limitCount(numprevitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
{{error.message}}
{{comment.error.message}}
    View More Comments {{limitCount(numnextitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} / {{numnextitems_calculated}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
3. Board Game: Clue [Average Rating:5.65 Overall Rank:7618]
Charles Rayburn
United States
Cleveland
Tennessee
flag msg tools
badge
Avatar
mbmbmbmbmb
There's a murder or so they say
I'd tag Miss Scarlett any day

Not the tag that's played by kids
I heard that Plum already did

At this moment, I'm so hot
I might even settle for old Mrs. Peacock

With a few more drinks tonight
I know I'm getting Mrs. White






2 
 Thumb up
 tip
 Hide
  • [+] Dice rolls
Loading... | Locked Hide Show Unlock Lock Comment     View Previous {{limitCount(numprevitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
{{error.message}}
{{comment.error.message}}
    View More Comments {{limitCount(numnextitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} / {{numnextitems_calculated}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
4. Board Game: Pandemic [Average Rating:7.66 Overall Rank:73]
Charles Rayburn
United States
Cleveland
Tennessee
flag msg tools
badge
Avatar
mbmbmbmbmb
I have a fire that burns down below
It might be an STD, I just don't know

Since we touched, I am infected
But not with what I had expected

I hoped for a tender word of love
You told me not to wear a glove

Now I itch and burn like hell
Just how much can this thing swell?

The price I have had to pay is high
For just a single piece of pie.




6 
 Thumb up
 tip
 Hide
  • [+] Dice rolls
Loading... | Locked Hide Show Unlock Lock Comment     View Previous {{limitCount(numprevitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
{{error.message}}
{{comment.error.message}}
    View More Comments {{limitCount(numnextitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} / {{numnextitems_calculated}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
5. Board Game: Ra [Average Rating:7.47 Overall Rank:134]
Charles Rayburn
United States
Cleveland
Tennessee
flag msg tools
badge
Avatar
mbmbmbmbmb
If you think there's nothing new
That bored lovers still can do

Try to make it with a god
Ra left me in a speechless awe

His ancient techniques made me weak
He says Cleopatra was a freak

I felt like I was on the Nile
In the grip on an erotic crocodile

And I am not ashamed to tell
I gave it up to Amun-Re as well
3 
 Thumb up
 tip
 Hide
  • [+] Dice rolls
Loading... | Locked Hide Show Unlock Lock Comment     View Previous {{limitCount(numprevitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
{{error.message}}
{{comment.error.message}}
    View More Comments {{limitCount(numnextitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} / {{numnextitems_calculated}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
6. Board Game: Ticket to Ride [Average Rating:7.46 Overall Rank:125] [Average Rating:7.46 Unranked]
Charles Rayburn
United States
Cleveland
Tennessee
flag msg tools
badge
Avatar
mbmbmbmbmb
I was given a ticket to ride
But one taste left me unsatisfied

So I rode once more through Europe land
For a week afterwards, I could not stand

Then I put on lederhosen
As Switzerland I enjoyed exposing

But never did I get enough
Of tussling with trains in the buff

So I took on all three one steamy night
My wife walked in to the ghastly sight

With plastic trains on the bed I lay
Wearing a thong of gold lame'



1 
 Thumb up
 tip
 Hide
  • [+] Dice rolls
Loading... | Locked Hide Show Unlock Lock Comment     View Previous {{limitCount(numprevitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
{{error.message}}
{{comment.error.message}}
    View More Comments {{limitCount(numnextitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} / {{numnextitems_calculated}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
Loading... | Locked Hide Show Unlock Lock Comment     View Previous {{limitCount(numprevitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
{{error.message}}
{{comment.error.message}}
    View More Comments {{limitCount(numnextitems_calculated,commentParams.showcount)}} / {{numnextitems_calculated}} 1 « Pg. {{commentParams.pageid}} » {{data.config.endpage}}
Front Page | Welcome | Contact | Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | Advertise | Support BGG | Feeds RSS
Geekdo, BoardGameGeek, the Geekdo logo, and the BoardGameGeek logo are trademarks of BoardGameGeek, LLC.