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Subject: Chatting about other topics while gaming rss

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Is it still considered gaming if most people around the topic is talking about other topics the whole time ?

I've encountered new gamers who tends to just do their move without much thought or only think when its their turn and are usually focus on another topic of discussion or gossip.

How does one handle such situation ? What are your similar experience ? Is that just people being people, or is there an issue of "game ethic", this does not happen with the "gamers" and so lets not assume everyone have to be "gamers", but what to do when such group is your gaming group for the night ?

Anyone just stop the game and go get a cold one for everyone and exchange gaming for the current prevailing topic ?
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Adam Porter
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djay16 wrote:
Is it still considered gaming if most people around the topic is talking about other topics the whole time ?

I've encountered new gamers who tends to just do their move without much thought or only think when its their turn and are usually focus on another topic of discussion or gossip.

How does one handle such situation ? What are your similar experience ? Is that just people being people, or is there an issue of "game ethic", this does not happen with the "gamers" and so lets not assume everyone have to be "gamers", but what to do when such group is your gaming group for the night ?

Anyone just stop the game and go get a cold one for everyone and exchange gaming for the current prevailing topic ?


I think it's just an issue of knowing your group and their preferences - it gets easier to recognise peoples' style of play as you play with more diverse groups over time.

Be generous enough to give your fellow players whatever experience they are seeking - whether that be a focussed gaming evening, or a social evening with some light games as "background noise" amongst the chatter.

Pick your games carefully once you get a feel for the groups. If people want to talk about other topics through the games, that is their prerogative (so long as that is the majority feeling in the group), so try and pick games that facilitate this. That might mean playing light games, dice games, or even game that require little thought like Fluxx. Certainly, you're going to want turn-based games rather than simultaneous play. It would be very frustrating to play a simultaneous game like 7 Wonders, The Resistance, etc with such a group.

If this isn't your own favoured play-style, then you're going to have to find another group who like to play in the same manner as you. This doesn't mean abandoning your previous group - it just means putting some effort into finding an alternate group for a different gaming experience.

Forcing players to play games in a mode which they don't enjoy is a recipe for bad feeling and turning off potential gaming partners.

If it was one individual ruining the focus/concentration required for your games, I would suggest talking to the individual, but it sounds like yours is a case of a group developing their own playing style.
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Chris Flux
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Short answer, yes it's still gaming if you have a game out.

How you and your group chose to interact over the game is your choice and will probably be different from every other user here. If you don't want the chat don't play with those people or pick a game that is better suited to allow chat too.
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Jesper Hansen
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stop their conversation, tell them bluntly that thats not the conversations they're meant to be having when they're playing games with you. In the same motion, gather their phones and throw 'em out a windows and tell them that phones aint allowed around boardgames.

Or maybe be cool and let people talk about what they want If you dont like what they say, find new friends.
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Nathan
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djay16 wrote:
Is it still considered gaming if most people around the topic is talking about other topics the whole time ?

I've encountered new gamers who tends to just do their move without much thought or only think when its their turn and are usually focus on another topic of discussion or gossip.

How does one handle such situation ? What are your similar experience ? Is that just people being people, or is there an issue of "game ethic", this does not happen with the "gamers" and so lets not assume everyone have to be "gamers", but what to do when such group is your gaming group for the night ?

Anyone just stop the game and go get a cold one for everyone and exchange gaming for the current prevailing topic ?


Yes it most definitely is gaming. Playing games is gaming as far as I was aware. If we are not allowed to talk about non-game related issues during a game to be considered a gamer then I am not a gamer despite having a fairly large collection and playing games as often as possible.

I would not regard it as a "situation" to handle. If you do not enjoy that type of game play and wish everyone to talk about the game and/or concentrate then you probably need to find new people to game with. I game to socialise as well as play games. If someone did not like to talk and tried to get others to not talk they would stop being invited to stuff.

It is just different taste, not right or wrong. You find them difficult to play with, they might find your style boring to play with. Horses and courses or something like that.
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Shelby Buttimer
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djay16 wrote:
Is it still considered gaming if most people around the topic is talking about other topics the whole time ?

I've encountered new gamers who tends to just do their move without much thought or only think when its their turn and are usually focus on another topic of discussion or gossip.

How does one handle such situation ? What are your similar experience ? Is that just people being people, or is there an issue of "game ethic", this does not happen with the "gamers" and so lets not assume everyone have to be "gamers", but what to do when such group is your gaming group for the night ?

Anyone just stop the game and go get a cold one for everyone and exchange gaming for the current prevailing topic ?


For some people, gaming comes first and conversation second. They might chat a bit when it's not their turn, but generally, the focus is on the game.

For other people, games are an excuse to get together and be social and chat. It makes little difference to them if they win or lose or even if the game gets going at all. They'll happily sit and chat for half an hour with the game all set up while people in the latter group are looking daggers at them.

My suggestion to you would be not to try to change the chatterers (it won't work) but to try to find the people looking daggers at them and invite them for a smaller game night just for "no talking" people. At any rate, that's what we did when we had some real chatterboxes join our big game group.

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Jessica
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Gaming is a social activity to me. I don't mind the conversations (and enjoy them) as long as it doesn't bog down the game. If it slows down the game, then it's fair for someone to be called on it. That's normally pretty effective. Now, if it is the talking or non-game talk in general that bothers you, then that's your own preference, but you won't be able to change the group's dynamics. It'd be easier to find a like-minded group.

I have one friend that I game with regularly that has always been a major talker. I've lost count of the number of times we've had to tell her to stop talking so we can pick a game or get the rules explanation started. Once the game starts, I haven't noticed any issues, though.
 
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Ryan Dolton

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Just be careful OP, because one day you might actually enjoy the Conversation going on around the game.
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This isn't just limited to the talk... some groups, it's not "real gaming" if all we did was play a few hands of Uno, and then a couple of games of Apples To Apples.



Me, I actually do enjoy talking about other stuff from time to time. Speaking of which, if I get roped into a "brain dead" game like the various Fluxxes, party games, or filler games, then I often have to entertain myself by getting to know those around me better, or just catching up. More than once, I have declined joining in games b/c I'd rather focus my full attention to chatting up with others, plus snacking on vittles.

However, some games takes more concentration. Also, it can be against group preferences to slow down the game just to get a conversation in.


As for holding the game up, I'd say "your turn" to nudge people to keep the game moving. As for not making the best move... there's no way to guarantee that if they were much better focused that they would do significantly better, but either way, it sounds like you should try to find other groups.
 
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J Holmes
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Depends, if its Poker having others talk is great, if its Battlestar Galactica: The Board Game you probably want to keep it within game.
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