Solid review. Your link to the rules shows as invalid or expired.
I also found the bit about how to determine which player gets the Tie Breaker Marker to be a bit wonky. IMO, all of the readability issues are fixed if the wording is changed to "The player who was most recently eaten by a dragon is given the Tie Breaker Marker."
Thanks for the compliment, I'll try and fix up that link too.
The readability could be improved, it just really through me off as it was out of nowhere and I thought it might be a game mechanic somehow.
"The person who has most recently eaten eggs goes first."