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Carl Parsons
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Carrollton
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WP News Release 8-17-2004

New King Crowned; Westeros in joy for Grey joy

Theon Greyjoy was crowned the new king today in the Royal Palace at King’s Landing. The ceremony was a joyous one with what seemed like the entire city out on the streets welcoming his rule. Large crowds lined the streets to watch the parade that wound from the harbor to the palace. The reception was enormous without a sign of the small group of protestors normally seen during a coronation.

“Theon is the most loved person in the world” stated a cheering spectator, in response to the lack of anti-Greyjoy sentiment. “How can anyone be upset that such a generous and magnanimous person is now on the throne?”

This amount of acceptance is unusual considering the lengthy and brutal war that led up this day. The rule of Baratheon weighed heavily on the peoples of the land and a general uprising took root. Four of the major houses of the land took sword against the then sitting king.

In response to a ridiculous amount of royal spending and an almost insulting pittance of tax cuts for the common people the houses of Tyrell, Greyjoy, Lannister and Stark mustered their troops and marched to war. When asked for a comment an unnamed house captain said: “ My master is tired of the nepotism and lying. Oh yeah, the dumbass on the throne can barely speak coherently, what kind of a ruler is that?”

Many alliances were made and broken throughout the conflict but the one that made the biggest impact was the Stark/Greyjoy alliance. Both camps have told differing versions of the story. Stark whines that they were backstabbed by the Greyjoys after holding to their alliance religiously. The Greyjoys maintain that they had undeniable evidence that the Starks were planning treachery from the start and had absolutely no interest in upholding their side of the alliance.

The facts remain that it was Stark’s abandonment of their home at Winterfell in order to attack Greyjoy troops stationed at Moat Caitlin that allowed Greyjoy to seize Winterfell for their own. It was this kind of brilliant planning that allowed Greyjoy to win the war and claim the throne.

In his address to the people Theon Greyjoy states: “I hold no ill will to the Starks for their dastardly deeds. In fact I wish to thank them for the limited time they held to our alliance. It was these early days that allowed me to plan for the ultimate victory.”

King Greyjoy will start reigning tomorrow indefinitely.

This is brought to you by Westeros Press; keeping the news neutral.

WP Press. 2004
 
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