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Snail's Pace Race» Forums » Sessions

Subject: Oh, the intense and epic struggle of the Snails! rss

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Scott Lewis
United States
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NFHS Football & Basketball
Dread Our Coming, Suffer Our Presence, Embrace Our Glory (Solonavi War Cry)
The snails were lined up, ready for the race. All of them were perspiring with anxiety. Or was it just the regular snail-goo that they excrete? Who knows. In any case, they were ready. Yellow decided to have some last minute munchies to help him through the race, and Blue was rarin' to go, hopping on his foot out of excitement.

Suddenly, the gun went off. Or whatever the bug-equivalent of a gun would be. Maybe it was just a twig breaking. Whatever it was, the snails were off. Or, at least, they were in theory. Blue, having been anxious to get started, crawled forward a bit. He took an early lead, but the rest of the snails crawled slowly behind him. All except Yellow, who was still eating his last-minute breakfast and had apparently not heard the starting sound whatever-it-was.

Blue, having exerted himself early, began to be tired, and the other snails were able to close in on him while he rested. Even Yellow noticed that he was alone at the starting line, and began to move forward, racing blindly towards who knows what. More food, perhaps?

Finally, Blue gets his second wind. Or second slime. Or whatever second thing that snails get. He crossed the finish line, and there was much cheering and chirping and tweeting and buzzing and clacking and squishing and whatever other sounds you'd hear at the end of a race for snails. Probably snoring, too, I'd imagine, but we'll pretend that part isn't there.

Now for the exciting second part. The LAST place snail ALSO wins. What would then motivate the rest of the snails to try and finish fast, who knows. Maybe at this point they are just sliding on their slime and can't stop themselves, and so it's all momentum from here on out. Anyway, the race was winding up when suddenly... A giant meteorite slams into the middle of the track. The snails scatter to safety. Yes, they scattered. It makes you wonder why they don't just scatter that fast when they are RACING, but they all somehow left uninjured. Off in the distance, the playful giggles of a 10-month-old girl could be heard, and the snails cringe lest the baby throw another comet of justice into their midst.

So they all decided to go back into their Box O' Protection and await their next opportunity to participate in the next great...


Edit: typo
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