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Subject: Help needed: How shall I destroy my game of Monopoly? rss

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So my wife picked up a game of Monopoly on the side of the road yesterday. I'm serious. I don't know why she would do this. She knows I despise it. Perhaps she wanted to rescue the rest of the world from picking it up? Yes, that must be it! It was a good deed she was doing, sparing a poor soul from accidentally getting it and playing it.

So now it's my turn to do a good deed: destroy the game. Yup, I'm serious! And here's where I need your help. And your ideas. That's what this is about: How shall I destroy my game of Monopoly?

Now don't get too worried here, we're not talking about a limited edition gold plated anniversary edition Star Wars version of the game. Nope. Plain Jane Monopoly. An old box. An old board. Old cards. It's not old enough to be an antique. It's not new enough to fool someone into thinking it's worth playing. Everything is there (I think), but it doesn't have the rules, so I couldn't play it even if I wanted to! What a relief.



I don't mind liberating the houses and hotels, and set them free to be used in other games. But what shall I do with the Monopoly game itself? And here's where you come in. Help me come up with ideas for the best way to wipe this particular game off the face of the earth. Shall I burn it? Shall I drop it off a high building? Shall I drive over it with my mini-van? Shall I bury it? Shall I put the money in random letter boxes? Shall I mix it with pet food and feed it to the neighbour's dog? Shall I turn it into a Halloween costume? Shall I put it in a blender? Shall I use it as a plate for a BBQ meal?

Be creative! Be original! Be funny! Be crazy! Come up with good ideas about what to do with the money. And the street cards. And the board. And the box. Or the whole shebang. I'm going to take one of these ideas and with a GameBuddy's help, I'm going to go through with this. Maybe I'll even be able to do several things with it.

So here's what to do: add an entry to my GeekList with your idea.
http://www.boardgamegeek.com/geeklist/37107
And if you like someone else's idea and think that's a good candidate for me to consider implementing, by all means give their idea a thumbs up. But most importantly, I want to see some good ideas.

Either way, I'm dead serious about taking care of this game once and for all. I'm really going to do this! And I'll probably even take pictures! And post them here. So please help me and my GamerBuddy find a good way to make the last few moments of my Monopoly memorable. I want this to be a special experience. Like a ritual burning. An inner cleansing. Please help.

Should I burn it?



It seems to be the obvious choice. Fire! Burn, baby, burn!



But maybe it's too obvious? It's been done before. If we are going to destroy a game, we want to make it BGG picture worthy. Crazy. Radical. We want an image that will rocket up the charts, because gamers everywhere will feel inwardly cleansed and warm inside when they see the visual proof of the manner of the death of this particular game. No, fire will be my last resort for destroying this game. I want to consider more options first.

If you could destroy a game of Monopoly completely guilt free, in any way you chose, how would you do it? And what would be a fitting way for me to do it? (don't forget that I'm not the President of the USA with full access to nuclear arsenal or NASA, so please don't go suggesting I use it as part of an atomic bomb or include it on the next space capsule to Mars).

Please add particularly great ideas to my Geeklist.

Edit: the carnage has started! Monopoly money becomes bathroom decor, and goes through a blender, is made into a cigarette...





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Bill Lawson
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Burn it!
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Don Weed
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Make it a collectible game, that should destroy it.

(Can you imagine collectible monopoly? "Dang, that's my fifth Scotty Dog token and I still havent gotten an Illinois Ave. Deed card! I'll take another case please" People would show up to conventions with 5 Boardwalks that they paid $50 each. Waitaminnut, with all the different themed sets, they already have!)
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Rod Batten
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I'd like to see photos of it being eaten. With or without a condiment of your choice. Barbecuing's already been done. devil

You shouldn't eat the pieces if they're in the box, they probably contain lead.
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Phil McDonald
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Frankly,I don't care what you do with it as it's not going to do me any harm. Sorry if that's being selfish.

But if you want to do great good for the human race, please devise a plan to prevent any more versions being released. I am utterly sick of them. talk about a one trick pony and milking a stone and getting blood out of a road that has no turning.

better go... I'm frothing now.

Phil.

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Exit 191
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philmcd wrote:
better go... I'm frothing now.


[bad joke]No wonder your "frothing" you said a latte.[/bad joke]
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Jeff Binning
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Don't destroy it. Make a game of it. Take it to a local thrift store and tell them it's a very special and rare edition. Encourage them to put a higher than normal price on it. Then check it frequently and see how long it takes for them to sell it. You could start a betting pool!

I'm offering an alternative idea because I could never bring myself to destroy any game, no matter how bad. Which is why I still own Past Lives and Global Survival.
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Gamers don't destroy games. Sacrilege.
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Jon Anderson
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Ok, you want something pretty dramatic and for that fire does sort of need to be involved. Since burning is a bit banal, what about using the money for make roll your own rocket engines or fireworks. Much more dramatic than a simple burning, and an added element of danger to boot.
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Brad Fuller
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Every single piece can be used for a prototype. Label paper can cover up the board, box, and cards.
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Ember Ross
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MWChapel wrote:
Gamers don't destroy games. Sacrilege.


I agree. But this isn't a game we're talking about...it's Monopoly. The proverbial streak mark on the underwear of the table top board game genre. It's a travesty and it deserves whatever creatively cruel fate the denizens of this forum choose to grant it.
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Taylor Liss
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I think explosives are in order. Fireworks sound likea good idea. It would be really pretty to see a multitude of colorful pieces floating down to the earth.
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Throknor
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Having fond memories of playing this game growing up with my family, I'll never understand the hatred it receives. It taught us to take turns, to shop frugally, to offer balanced trades giving something up to get what is wanted, and that financial trouble can come multiple times in a row so it's just dangerous to spend all of your cash.

Yes, there are other games that may be more fun to play. But as a solid piece of family life for many years I think it deserves a little more respect than it generally gets.

Don't get me wrong - there are a ridiculous number of money-grabbing re-themes going on. But I blame that on the company and the market, not the game.
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Kevin Nieman
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Here is my list of Monopoly-destroyers.

1. Sulphuric acid bath. - Not sure where to get industrial acid, but you can find a way. After all. We're all on the Internets, right?
2. Rifle range/Deserted area - Take pot shots at the abomination with your favorite assault weapon.
3. Wood chipper: You remember "Fargo," right?

Personally, the fire-thing would be a better visual. If you go that route, please be careful. Oh, and give us a link to the pics, and maybe the YouTube video.

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Put into a nuclear reactor? ninja

Throw into Turbine of a jet plane.

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Hank Panethiere
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Since fire seems to be the method of choice...

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Russ Williams
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I'm of the "don't destroy a game" school of thought.

Find the rules online, print them out to include in the box, and give it to a thrift store, or to a charity, or to a hospital, or to a retirement home.

But if you're set on destroying it, then I propose you create a piece of art out of it. Paint the board, glue the pieces into a weird sculpture, make a collage with the cards and money, add other found objects, something like that. Then sell it to a museum for $100,000.
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Patrick McInally
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russ wrote:
I'm of the "don't destroy a game" school of thought.

Find the rules online, print them out to include in the box, and give it to a thrift store, or to a charity, or to a hospital, or to a retirement home.

But if you're set on destroying it, then I propose you create a piece of art out of it. Paint the board, glue the pieces into a weird sculpture, make a collage with the cards and money, add other found objects, something like that. Then sell it to a museum for $100,000.


Definitely the better way to go.

If you destroy that copy of Monopoly, a child from a less fortunate family will never get the chance at it when they're mother/father/whatever picks it up at Goodwill. Consequently, they'll never log on to boardgamegeek looking for the rules, never discover Settlers of Catan, and never become a lifetime gamer.

Seriously. Destroying it? Funny -- sure, the thought of it's funny. Actually doing it? Not cool.

There are plenty of people out there who would be thrilled to own it.
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Eddy Richards
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Why not just play it until it wears out?
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Ya know, I'm a pretty even-tempered guy. I have my likes and dislikes like everyone, and there are games I really dislike and a few I'm passionate about.

And yet, I can't fathom the ludicrous amount of energy people spend on absolutely despising a game.

I can understand elitism, snobbery, disdain, and dislike. I can understand preferring a whole bunch of other games instead.

But can you not find a positive things in your game life to put you energy and passion into rather than descending into the sheer negative vitriol of "how shall I destroy my copy"?

If you don't want it, there have already been some good suggestions here. If those don't appeal to you, then just put it in the garbage. Then go sign up for Big Brothers and use that energy and time you obviously have a lot of to teach some kid how to play games.
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jeez. agree with the above sentiment. Monopoly is not an awesome game. Monopoly is also not as awful as ppl on here say, nor is it the source of all evil. Is this a familiarity that breeds contempt? If you really really want to dispose of it please RECYCLE it.
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statman8 wrote:
Make it a collectible game, that should destroy it.

(Can you imagine collectible monopoly? "Dang, that's my fifth Scotty Dog token and I still havent gotten an Illinois Ave. Deed card! I'll take another case please" People would show up to conventions with 5 Boardwalks that they paid $50 each. Waitaminnut, with all the different themed sets, they already have!)

i'd have said they did it with the McDonald's Monopoly

Quote:
jeez. agree with the above sentiment. Monopoly is not an awesome game. Monopoly is also not as awful as ppl on here say, nor is it the source of all evil. Is this a familiarity that breeds contempt? If you really really want to dispose of it please RECYCLE it.

just because cthulhu isn't ON the box doesn't mean it's not the source of all evil. because there is definitely mind-wrenching horror INSIDE the box.
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I'm definitely with the destroy it crowd. I admit to owning a copy my son likes it, got a nice wooden box set so it looks nice. but the thousands (millions?) of plain janes ones are just a blight.

Here is one idea. Only destroy the insides. Then take a good beginner game like carcasson and put that in the box instead then sell it to the thrift store with a the rules and a note about the switch.

As for the insides. Take the money and put in in the bathroom to use in place of toilet paper.

If you have a bird on some other animal in a cage use the board to line the bottom.

Ever flatten a coin on train tracks? I think that would be a fitting end to the pieces.

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As a few others have already said, the amount of hate this game gets here is ridiculous. Here is a basic fact - played with the rules in the box, without any house rules thrown in, Monopoly is not a bad game at all. It is certainly not the worst game out there, and frankly, I'd play it before I'd play quite a few Euros, and even a few wargames as well. There is strategy involved, and decisions to be made. Put a picture of a serious-looking 15th century money lender on the box cover, replace all pieces with wooden cubes, rename the spaces for Western European landmarks, and call the game "Geldverleiher" and this place would probably love it.
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Kevin Purring
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Strap it with fireworks and drop it from a helicopter into a volcano.

Oh wait, that's what they're going to do with my body when I die.
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