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Subject: Tom Swifties rss

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♪ Isaäc Bickërstaff ♫
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The results of a five yeer studee ntu the sekund lw uf thurmodynamiks aand itz inevibl fxt hon shewb rt nslpn raq liot.
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"It can't be healthy to stand behind the car all day," Tom said exhaustedly. "But it's far better than standing in front of it," he added tiredly.
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King of All Simians — Not a Mere Diplomat
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"What was the name of that animated movie with the Nilsson soundtrack?" she asked pointedly.

"I don't know, but avoid that new movie, Knowing; the lead actor is terrible," he answered cagily.
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"This play sucks," he said theatrically.
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Drew1365 wrote:
"No one ever sends me flowers," he said, lackadaisically.


"I get them all the time," she said rosily.
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"Ooh, there's a hole in my pocket," he said cockily.
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"That scrape must sting when you touch it," she said sensitively.
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jarredscott78 wrote:
"Ooh, there's a hole in my pocket," he said cockily.
Heh, I never saw cockily in a swifty before but could work in a lot of places: "I really like you," he said cockily. "These pants are too tight around the waist," etc.
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"My leg, it is fractured!" he said, in broken English.
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"How do I beat that?" he waxed jocularly.
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"Could I, you know...put...(cough) it...like, in?" he beat around the bush.
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"I've got to stop masturbating!" he expounded.
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"I say!" Tom said.
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"Hey look, it's Jesus," Tom said rapturously.
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"Turn ninety degrees to the right," Tom said orthogonally.
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"What's with Madonna's bra?" Tom said sharply.
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"Brian Posehn is a funny comic, but he kind of creeps me out," Tom said murderously.
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"Rocket approaching at six o'clock!" he yelled miscellaneously.
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"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" he said quizically...
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"I'd like to to stop them talking about genitals!" thought Tom silently and privately. He confessed to being quite religious.

"Come on guys!" he ejaculated gaily, making the playful suggestion "How about a board game instead?". "My favourite theme is trading in the Mediterranean" - this said warily, they could see - "and where there's lots of math I do well" he added with a winning smile. "Wargames also" he volunteered combatatively. Finally and cryptically he ventured "But at the end of the evening I do like a good dungeoncrawl".
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"I swear I'm innocent!" he said, pleadingly.
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"I need to replace my hook," the pirate said offhandedly.
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"I'm into homosexual necrophilia," said Tom in dead earnest.
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"It's awfully dark in here," Tom said delightedly.
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"I like beastiality", he said sheepishly.
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"Am I going blind?" little Stevie wondered.
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