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Subject: EPYC 18-A: What Edith Wharton should have written.... rss

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Steph Mabie
United States
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Group A: swmabie, KentuckyKid, bobxyzp, Muzza, shininiu, baditude, Kodeir, DukeOfEarl, Donkey Thong, Reish Galuta, bjhendricks

I was forced, in my sophomore year of high school, to read what I have long since considered to be the most dry, boring, and emotionless love story in the history of the written word. Imagine my surprise when I see that it's first sentence is considered to be among the best opening lines of novels ever. And much like the events of the penultimate chapter of that particular novel, this EPYC chain started off slowly and then suddenly rushing down the hill, swerving just near the end.

So we begin with the eloquence of Edith Wharton and her masterwork, Ethan Frome....

I had the story, bit by bit, from various people, and, as generally happens in such cases, each time it was a different story.


The more people he heard from about the traffic accident, the more disastrous the story became, and the more horrified his expression.


As the word spread, a small car crash evolved into a massive pile up of cars.


I don't trust these intelligent cars, you know? They mess up badly whenever they have a crush.


Donkey Thong:
I must wave away my thoughts of graduating as an orange crush drinking VW Beetle.

Reish Galuta:

Joe couldn't break through the force-field protecting the thirsty, educated VW Beetle, not even by swatting ping-pong balls at it.

Now, if I'd had that to read, maybe I wouldn't absolutely hate English classes to this day....
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