So, yeah. (Ya know, i think I've been starting a lot of posts like that lately...)
On the way to work this morning. It's Friday, probably going to be a good day, birds are chirping at the feeder, coffee is good, just generally a good day. I find myself humming to myself on my way in to my desk. Snow is pretty out the window, under a pretty blue sky with occasional white puffies scattered there purely for dramatic effect I'm sure. Just a good day.
Get an email from my boss. Well, technically, my boss's boss's boss. The big guy.
I had previously emailed him requesting some information. yeah, I know - you don't normally email guys this big directly... in this case, it's considering some info on a potential promotion for me. The big boss had expressed interest in doing (direct quote) "whatever he could to help get me promoted", and he is the only person who can get the preliminary results for me (they are only released to folks at his level). So I emailed him asking politely if he could get shoot a quick email or make a quick phone call, as I'm very interested in the results.
Big boss replies to me, copied to my boss and my boss's boss. Not great results on the promotion thing (not terrible either, but had been hoping for a top-tier recommendation and got just a general recommendation), with a note about I should have received that info through my other bosses. Phone call about 5 minutes later from my boss's boss, saying that he told me this information already (he didn't, but he thinks he did) and that I should have talked to him first, etc etc. Pretty unhappy with me for even asking the question of the big guy. (you know, a peon of my level - what was I thinking requesting audience with the Great and Powerful Wizard?? He doesn't see anyone, no-way, no-how!)
(And, yes, I do know how to use my chain of command, and I do recognize that normally you don't go straight to the top for info. The thing is, the Big Guy was the only one who could do this for me, and had told me that he would... :sigh: )
So we've managed to destroy my mood today. Promotion probably a long shot, bosses unhappy, and me left feeling pretty #$&* unappreciated.
Other than venting on Chit Chat (thanks!), how do YOU recover or rebuild a good mood?
I'll take Manhattan in a garbage bag. With Latin written on it that says "It's hard to give a shit these days"
If I worked at a place where the big boss got mad because I asked him something directly, I'd not care about being promoted, but about looking for a place that isn't run like an army.
I can, and I have, bypassed multiple levels of hierarchy when it was warranted, and never had any trouble whatsoever. The top of the hierarchy calls me into meetings when they know that I am the ultimate source for the information they need.
Don't fret about what you did. Instead, wonder why what you did was considered so harmful.
It's office politics. Some people will always feel more self-entitled than others and will try to make their authority known. It's like they want to feel like they exist so they try to do things that are completely stupid or pointless. I wouldn't worry about it too much. I just like to think that those people will get sucked into a black hole in the future.
Yes, they do. Most people think their feelings just happen and then your feelings dictate your thoughts. Wrong! You conscious mind can direct your subconscious. If you use positive affirmations, you will change your feelings.
Say, out loud, "I decide to be happy". You will feel better, happier. You should use positive words, not double negatives, like "I am not being sad." Your subconscious ignores the 'not' and focusses on the 'sad'.
I decide to be calm.
I decide to be happy.
I deserve love and respect.
I love myself.
I deserve good health.
Use affirmations, and you will feel better.
Another good action is to use Cognitive Court. Imagine a high court, judge, jury, prosecution counsel and so on. Picture it all in your mind and make it vivid, make it real. Now put the bad thought in the dock.
"My boss is angry at me because I went over his head. I've done a bad thing."
Now picture yourself as the counsel for the defence. Start challenging the bad thought like it's a court case. As defence counsel, you can rip holes in bad thought's claims.
Was it really a bad thing, since the Big Boss did say Jeff could call. "Yeah but, now Boss looks stupid. Jeff made Boss look stupid by implying he hadn't had the information." Well, did Boss actually pass on the information that he should have? "No, right, he didn't, but" But Boss should have passed it on, shouldn't he and he didn't, did he? So my client Jeff was quite entitled to ask the Big Boss, wasn't he? "Yeah, but " And didn't the Big Boss tell my client that he could call on him? We have the evidence here [shows court the video of the Big Boss "Jeff, listen, if you want, I can get the promo info for you early on, OK? Just give me a bell if you want it."] There, you can see the Big Boss wasn't concerned if the Boss looked bad or not, he just wanted to help Jeff. Isn't that the true picture?
And so on. Keep knocking the Bad Thought's arguments down, and pretty soon Jeff will be walking out a free man. Cognitive Court works.