Crew Evaluation Report; Experimental Simulation IOBS1.1-A
T'Ki'rk; Pilot, Zoallan, Acting Captain
Jamie Smith; Pilot, Human
Stark; Science Officer, Human
JollySob; Science Officer, Tentac
D'n'k'n, Engineer, Zoallan
Narvog, Marine, Canosian
Xevan, Marine, Xeloxian
Our intrepid crew reported to the space dock bright and early, to be confronted by Sarge Grimm as his usual charming self.
This will be your first official mission for the UREF.
Cadet W'ill'J'en will be Acting Captain.
If you do not successfully complete your assignment, you WILL be cleaning out the latrines during graduation. Due to the expense of replacing even old and decommissioned star scouts, you WILL be using an advanced simulator. If you break the simulator, I will see that NONE of you EVER leave the Training Facility. You will be kept on to do menial tasks that not even the Bots wish to perform. Do you understand?
I said, "DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"
Captain T'K'i'rk selected a ship of Zoallan registry for the squad. This proved to be the first of many mistakes made by our team. One cannot fault a sentient for feeling his race has the superior equipment I am sure.
I personally feel that this choice is the fault of the Science officers, Stark felt that he obviously should have been in command of our mission. This human demanded a very complicated reconfiguration of the ship, almost completely restructuring our old scout. The JollySob merely slumped about in a depressed fashion over the choice of ship. It may have deep seated personal issues.
During the Hyperspace trip, JollySob upgraded the Engineers toolkit as a Science Exercise for Xavan. This unit was neglected by Mr Stark, as attention to my functioning could have improved the crew chances, but instead Mr Stark spent the trip tinkering in the Hyperdrive module. This unit was dispatched to perform calibrations on the Tractor Module which replaced one of my beloved Engines. D'n'k'n and the Captain upgraded the starboard engine, and the Human Pilot and Canosian Marine simply lounged around during the Hyperspace Jump.
The mission was to warp into the training area, download information from the derelict ship, tow it far enough from the planet to warp it out, and shoot one of the relay stations by the derelict. Such a simple mission, but you know how organics are. There were some speed and time requirements also, but this unit was not briefed upon them. In fact, this unit feels that it was underutilized.
The ship arrived 20 standard units from the planet in the training area at a speed of 4 standard units. Luckily, we were facing the direction the captain wished to proceed in. All the upgrades were completed without any damage accrued to the ship.
Xevan proceeded to the missile bay, as Mr Stark confused the Captain into thinking he needed to board the derelict, afterwards Mr Stark advised the Captain HE would be boarding the derelict with Xevan, and the Captain should stay and 'steer the ship or something.' D'n'k'n pumped power into the Helm to prepare for manuevers, as the Captain fully intended to complete the mission with high marks. JollySob interred himself in the Science Bay, familiarizing himself with the computer.
As Jamie put the 'petal to the metal' the ship vibrated with power, shaking us about. This unit was stationed at the Tractor Station mounted forward, between the Missile Bays. JollySob detected the launch of two missiles. one form each relay station. The Marines quickly fired a Missile from each bay,one at each relay station. Following this, Mr Stark prepared a boarding missile, and proceeded to fire himself and Xevan to the derelict. D'n'k'n pumped the upgraded engine module once more, and proceeded to run to throught the Science Bay to the secondary engine, to meet T'Ki'rk and Mr Stark's demands for more power to the guns and the helm. Narvog, was delegated to remain on the ship and defend us against boarding actions (quoted as a standard procedure from regulations), He shortly became bored in the launch bay, as JollySob informed him over ship's comm that only one missile would be needed to destroy the relay stations. Zoallan registration scout ships lack cannons...
Missiles approached, the ship continued to accelerate, Jollysob manned the Science station attempting to jam the missiles guidance systems. Narvog ran to the auxiliary engine to assist D'n'k'n with pumping power into the Helm. The Captain returned to the Helm to assist Jamie, who was beginning to have trouble handling the ship at the speeds she had reached. One run of bad luck at the Helm left the ship completely out of control and the hull was beginning to strain. In spite of her Spacelegs, Jamie had trouble getting the ship steadied and back under control. This unit was requested to evacuate the Tractor module and assist with engineering, but the ship was spiraling so far out of control, this unit could not even safely change position. The Captain and Jamie managed to stabilize the ship and turn towards the derelict, but the speed was still excessive. The speed did however save the ship from most of the incoming missiles. Two were on the tail of the ship, and two more were already coming at us from the relay stations. JollySob reached the effective limit of his ECM capabilities, and headed to the Tractor bay. This unit was ordered to attempt Tractoring missiles in, and JollySob would attempt to defuse them. Unfortunately this unit was unable to tractor in a missile successfully. We took a missile strike to the front of the ship, but due to simulator error, the missile damage hit the helm, which had multiple crew members in it. The Helm was rendered inoperable. A second missile strike to the rear also damaged the Helm, again, since physically it would be impossible, it must have been simulator error. The Helm was slagged, The Captain was unconscious. JollySob was wounded. D'n'k'n had just arrived in the Helm to repair the damage and was lightly wounded. This unit was requested to assist and was rendered non-mobile after the missile impact due to damage. JollySob gathered his wits and began running across the ship to return to the Science Lab, as a nonfunctional helm would limit our control capabilities, and it desired to get the information before we moved beyond download range.
The final missile struck our ship concurrent to the boarding party of Mr Stark and Xevan moving from a the slagged engine of the derelict towards the Hyperdrive module.
Simulator error placed them in the engine, completely ignoring Xevan's successful piloting check. This final missile strike rendered JollySob unconscious, wounded Narvog who had moved into the Helm to assist with repairs, heavily burned the pilot. Regrettably Captain T'Ki'rk was killed in spite of his Zoallan carapace. The damage to this unit exceeded functional parameters and rendered sensors inoperable. This unit was last aware of Mr Stark uttering a berserker yell as he charged through the derelict ship.
Evalutaion from Programming Committee:
Theoretically, a lucky member of the remaining crew could have healed JollySob with his own Medikit, and JollySob could have restored the crew to consciousness and downloaded the necessary data.. Mr Stark was fully capable of activating the Hyperdrive on the derelict, barring any complications. It is purely theoretical, and highly unlikely that Jollysob would have been able to meet the mission time parameters, and the other crew members left on the Zoallan training vessel could not have successfully programmed the Hyperdrive. The Engineer could not have repaired the Helm before they moved quite some distance beyond easy downloading range. Mr Stark considered using the Science Bay on the derelict to upload the data to the Zoallan ship, but regrettably, his boarding crew lacked the Engineering skill to get an engine back online. This mission was technically a failure.
However, due to the massive targeting errors in the simulator programming, this crew will not be scrubbing the latrines. Appeal from the well connected JollySob has caught the attention of Academy officials, and the crew will be allowed to graduate. Physically the multiple missile strikes to the Helm should have been impossible.
Simulator Programming Supervisor
The following things will be corrected in the Simulator.
Tractor Mounts have a 360 degree firing arc
Missiles have a 360 degree firing arc
Piloted Boarding Missiles may choose their arrival module
Simulator will upgrade large cadet teams to Hull Size 6