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Subject: Holy crap, what a night! rss

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Isaac Citrom
Canada
Montreal
Quebec
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I stopped by an ATM Thursday late in the evening, which was in a strip mall. On the way out was that damned right turn only sign which takes me on a two block detour. I stretched my neck taking a good look around and went ahead and made the left turn anyway.

I'm heading West and I notice an SPVM (Service de police de la Ville de Montréal) police car bolting toward me, heading back toward the strip mall at 100 Km/h. OK, don't panic, I tell myself, as he flies past me. I continue along the boulevard and grab the first side-street I come upon. Luckily for me, there's a closed flooring plant and I scoot into its driveway. I shut down everything and lay down on the front bench of my car.

For the next five minutes I hear police sirens in the neighbourhood. The sweat is pouring down my face. I'm sure I was done for. To be on the safe side I stay there until about three in the morning. I leave my car there and walk the two kilometres home.

Now I'd like to go back and pick up my car but I'm not sure if the police ultimately found it and are watching the car right now. The complete news silence is thunderous.

So, those hair colour kits for women, they work on men too, right?

[Edit (Saturday morning)]

I have lovely neighbours and we're always helping out one another. One neighbour is a woman my age and she agreed to help me pick up the car. Damn, walking in heels is tough; I had no idea. She set me up in a lovely outfit that was attractive but didn't say, "hey look at me."

I managed to get the car home. Either the police had given up on their stakeout or my disguise fooled them. I may well never know. As a silver lining, I discovered that women's underwear is crazy comfortable; I love how they feel against my skin.
.
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Jim Cote
United States
Maine
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"If you're paranoid and think we're out to get you...we're going to have to put that in your file."
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Andy Andersen
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Michigan
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I'd do some kegel exercises. You're going to the Big House soon and well........

I just hope you're not pretty.
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Billy the Hut
United States
Boston
Massachusetts
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Sit beside the breakfast table Think about your troubles Pour yourself a cup of tea Then think about the bubbles
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Loose the title to the car, & if the cops come looking for you claim you sold it to some dude with a mullet a month ago.

Then buy a bike.
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Pieter
Netherlands
Maastricht
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I recommend "Big Bob's Plastic Surgoree".
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Peter Ferguson
Canada
Toronto
Ontario
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So, wait... In Quebec, drivers run red lights like its a provincial past time.. Yet make a left on a right turn only, and they send the swat team after you?
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Scott A. Reed
United States
Lawrence
Kansas
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Gatekeeper3000 wrote:
So, wait... In Quebec, drivers run red lights like its a provincial past time.. Yet make a left on a right turn only, and they send the swat team after you?


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The neutral evil villain known as
United States
Indiana
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Ow quit it.
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isaacc wrote:

police car bolting toward me, heading back toward the strip mall at 100 Km/h. OK, don't panic, I tell myself, as he flies past me.



If he really was after you, he's have spun around and got you. Do canadian police beat you? why so afraid?
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Liam
Scotland
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I'm confused. Issac are you feeling ok? (If this is a joke then ignore my concern.)

You broke a wee traffic rule that I suspect is broken on an hourly basis. It's a traffic offence and not a big one. If you had been pulled over; you could have just apologised and they may have let you off, if not it's what - a fine and some points on your licence?

Instead you opted to evade the police, ditch your car and hide till 3 in the morning. Now unless you are on your last warning on your licence, are wanted or have illegal items on your person - I think you really really overreacted. Paranoia and anxiety are worth mentioning to a doctor.

I wouldn't worry about this incident - I'd find it doubtful that the police were after you. The first car would have got you and it's highly doubtful that they would sent additional units using their sirens. Again they will not be physically watching your car.

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Luke Morris
England
Faversham
Kent
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Poutine. I'm pretty certain for any problems in Canada poutine is the answer.
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Mike Adams
United States
Brigham City
Utah
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In Quebec I'm pretty sure you can marry your car. A lot of crazy things are possible there. Then you can refuse to testify against it because it's your spouse. Likewise, it will refuse to testify against you. Win-win!
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