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Subject: How often do you and your live-in partner have sex? rss

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Lawson
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Poll: How often do you and your live-in partner have sex?
I'm curious about how often couples that live together have sex (with each other), and I created a poll for people to answer this, broken down by how long the couple has lived together.

I'm more than happy to hear thoughts about this, but I know it's a sensitive topic, so I thought a poll made the most sense as a way to get anonymous responses. One thing I'm curious about, aside from frequency itself, is where there are mismatches of levels of sexual interest. How common are those? Is it something that tends to change over time, or are the differences fairly consistent?

My categorization of "sex" is a reasonably broad, common-sensical one. (For instance, oral sex is certainly "sex"; hand-holding isn't, unless somebody has a hand-holding fetish or something.)

Thanks!
How long have you and your partner lived together, and how often do you have sex?
  more than once a day once a day 4-6 times per week 2-3 times per week once a week 2-3 times a month once a month more than once a year never
living together 3 months to 1 year
living together 1-3 years
living together 4-6 years
living together 7-10 years
living together 11-15 years
living together 16-20 years
living together 21-30 years
living together 31+ years
I don't live with anyone, but here's how often I think I'd want to have sex with a partner
      117 answers
Poll created by corross
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Dave G
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With each other, or with Jarred?
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The Steak Fairy
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The whole survey is thrown off by the failure to describe what the hand is holding.
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Mark F
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Why isn't there a "I don't live with my girlfriend" option?
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Murka wrote:
Why isn't there a "I don't live with my girlfriend" option?

you could technically still participate.
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Mark F
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What do you mean?
We're students, still living with our parents at least for another year until we finish our B.Sc's, we've been dating for 2 years, we're not married or anything yet...
 
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Lawson
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Murka wrote:
Why isn't there a "I don't live with my girlfriend" option?


Because I'm trying to keep it simple.

When people don't live together, there are presumably factors other than desire – like opportunity – that come into play more. What I'm curious about is how often partner sex happens for people who have been together for awhile and for whom sex is presumably more or less a daily option, whether or not that option is exercised.

Edited to add: I included a "I don't live with anyone" option at the end more or less as a goof.
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Lawson
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djgutierrez77 wrote:
With each other, or with Jarred?


Whoa – you have threesomes that include your mom? That's intense.
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Why can't those in a live in relationship vote on how often they would like to have sex? My wife and I have different sex drives.
 
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Lawson
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frumpish wrote:
Why can't those in a live in relationship vote on how often they would like to have sex? My wife and I have different sex drives.


That would make the poll too complicated. That said, feel free to weigh in, in whatever way you find comfortable.

Difference in sex drives (and how that plays out in sexual activity in ongoing relationships) is a lot of what interests me, although it's hard to get at in a public place like this.
 
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I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.
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Gregory Amstutz
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What about a "never enough" answer? devil
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Clay
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I answered for the period of time where we did live together, hopefully that doesn't destroy your highly scientific poll.
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Kevin Salch
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Of course it also depends on when the kids are home.
We have 2 of our 3 kids away at school and 1 living at home.
This allows for more sex when they are at school and less when they are at home. I imagine it might pick up a bit when there are no longer kids at home.
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Mac Mcleod
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There's also duration to consider.

http://www.news-medical.net/news/2008/04/01/36825.aspx
Quote:
Satisfactory sexual intercourse for couples lasts from 3 to 13 minutes, contrary to popular fantasy about the need for hours of sexual activity.


Notably
Quote:
Past research has found that a large percentage of men and women, who responded, wanted sex to last 30 minutes or longer.


Not saying one or the other is bad or good, just considering that all partners have similar expectations.
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Xander Fulton
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frumpish wrote:
I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.


I believe the assumption would be that all males would answer that straight down the column, so the poll is effectively simplified by omitting it.
 
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XanderF wrote:
frumpish wrote:
I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.


I believe the assumption would be that all males would answer that straight down the column, so the poll is effectively simplified by omitting it.


Count me as an exception to this assumption.
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Mac Mcleod
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jonnylawless wrote:
XanderF wrote:
frumpish wrote:
I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.


I believe the assumption would be that all males would answer that straight down the column, so the poll is effectively simplified by omitting it.


Count me as an exception to this assumption.


Ditto. Several times a day every day would require medication or something extraordinary.





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Xander Fulton
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maxo-texas wrote:
jonnylawless wrote:
XanderF wrote:
frumpish wrote:
I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.


I believe the assumption would be that all males would answer that straight down the column, so the poll is effectively simplified by omitting it.


Count me as an exception to this assumption.


Ditto. Several times a day every day would require medication or something extraordinary.



Are you kidding? You jest, surely?

Several times a day is easily possible. Well, I mean, physically, anyway. Convincing the lady that it's an awesome idea, less so...
 
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Jonny Lawless
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XanderF wrote:
maxo-texas wrote:
jonnylawless wrote:
XanderF wrote:
frumpish wrote:
I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.


I believe the assumption would be that all males would answer that straight down the column, so the poll is effectively simplified by omitting it.


Count me as an exception to this assumption.


Ditto. Several times a day every day would require medication or something extraordinary.



Are you kidding? You jest, surely?

Several times a day is easily possible. Well, I mean, physically, anyway. Convincing the lady that it's an awesome idea, less so...


Just because something is possible doesn't mean I want to do it.
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Mac Mcleod
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XanderF wrote:
maxo-texas wrote:
jonnylawless wrote:
XanderF wrote:
frumpish wrote:
I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.


I believe the assumption would be that all males would answer that straight down the column, so the poll is effectively simplified by omitting it.


Count me as an exception to this assumption.


Ditto. Several times a day every day would require medication or something extraordinary.



Are you kidding? You jest, surely?

Several times a day is easily possible. Well, I mean, physically, anyway. Convincing the lady that it's an awesome idea, less so...


Several times a day... every day... forever.

I love sex. Heck, we spend 6-9 hours a week frolicing in wild monkey love. But
a) that sounds like a job.
b) no woman I've ever known is that sexy.
c) we'd be worn raw all over- she would be very sore and head achy.
d) I'm not that sexy.
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When I was 25, I could and did go several times a day. But after the novelty wore off, it turned out that one and occasionally two really good times, with some foreplay and afterplay, was much more satisfying.

It's just better when it's not some kind of endurance contest.
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Xander Fulton
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mistermarino wrote:
When I was 25, I could and did go several times a day. But after the novelty wore off, it turned out that one and occasionally two really good times, with some foreplay and afterplay, was much more satisfying.


Guess it depends how you define "several". That's as little as two in certain context. (Although it does seem, on double-checking this, that common usage usually seems to usually imply more)

EDIT: And just to be clear, we aren't strictly restricted to the Bill Clinton definition of "sexual relations" for what counts, right?
 
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Clay
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XanderF wrote:
maxo-texas wrote:
jonnylawless wrote:
XanderF wrote:
frumpish wrote:
I would feel comfortable having sex several times a day.


I believe the assumption would be that all males would answer that straight down the column, so the poll is effectively simplified by omitting it.


Count me as an exception to this assumption.


Ditto. Several times a day every day would require medication or something extraordinary.



Are you kidding? You jest, surely?

Several times a day is easily possible. Well, I mean, physically, anyway. Convincing the lady that it's an awesome idea, less so...


I imagine it would quickly become hard to stay motivated for something like that. Sex is great but so is pizza. I don't eat pizza every day, only every other day. Now, sex is better than pizza, but not 2-3 times every day better.

Besides, that would seriously cut into my Minecraft time. Did you know they added potatoes? Fascinating!
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Three to five times a day for the first year or so, then seven to ten a week for another year or so, and finally just a few times a week leading up to the break-up.
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