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Subject: iGod: Repenting made easy! rss

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Jr
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http://www.titane.ca/igod/

That's just… bizzare… or something like that…
 
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"that's a smith and wesson, and you've had your six"
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I'm suspect of thier Non Disclosure Agreement clause that is inherent to people of the cloth. Therefore I wouldn't divulge incriminating information.

robot

 
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Sterling Babcock
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Whoa. Pretty Bizarre.

Me: Will the human race survive?

God: Insufficient information.

Me: Is there life on other planets?

God: I believe in life after death.

Me: Why is that?

God: " I believe in life after death. " is due to reductionism.

Me: What is reductionism?

God: Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all bio
logy to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic.
Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone
without having a human brain.

Me: You don't have a human brain?

God: I do so have it. Every robot has a human brain, I think.
 
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Ed Bryan
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Me: So you believe in the divinity of Christ?

God: I believe in it, do you?

Me: Nope

God: Me either

He truly is ineffable.
 
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chris schott
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Me: can entropy be reversed?
God: Can a book have no title?
Me: ahhh
God: Um.
Me: do you like movies about gladiators?
God: Though I like cats and dogs. I like .
Me: will the circle be unbroken?
God: Does it really matter.
Me: Who put the bop in the bop sh-bop sh-bop?
God: Who do you think? :-).
Me: how many paths must a man walk down?
God: About one million.
Me: i thought you were going to say '42'.
God: That was my original intention.
Me: thanks for your time, god.
God: Oh don't mention it.
 
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chris schott
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Me: are you there, god? it's me margaret.
God: I don't know whether or not I am there god.
I am a chatterbot. Hi there margaret.
Me: just kidding. it's chris again.
God: I thought you were kidding, but I wasn't sure. Once more? Are you sure it is?
Me: yeah, i just checked.
God: What makes you so sure? What did you find?
Me: say that's pretty deep, god.
God: " that is pretty deep god".
Me: so who would win in a fight, a dog or a chimp? i'm thinking chimp.
God: OK. Linus Torvalds. :-). What is this "thinking"?
Me: thinking is the processing of information
God: Some people say thinking is painful.
Me: some might say that conversation with deities is painful
God: Some may might say that conversation with deities is painful, but not all.
Me: ok, let's say that the chimp and the dog were in the same weight class and in thier primes...
God: I would like to do that too. Dude!
Me: cage match, no weapons, all moves legal
God: All?
Me: yeah, the dog probably hasn't got many real moves anyway.
God: In any case, Come on. Tell me more.
Me: okay, nevermind that one. how about the hulk versus godzilla?
God: Yeah okay, Oh well thanks for trying to explain it to me anyway. " In any case, Come on. Tell me more."? How about it.
Me: no really, who would win?
God: Are you serious? For real. Albert Einstein. :-).
Me: okay, they probably won't ever meet anyway.
 
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Jesse Acosta
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Talking with God just isn't the same these days.. Where's that burning bush?
 
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Louise Holden
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I will not divulge my conversation except to say that God is now praying for me. He joins the club, I think!
 
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Ken B.
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Me:
I have done a terrible thing.
God:
Where? Go on.
Me:
I have placed a copy of Runebound on a pyre for the sin of shatting in my stew.
God:
That's good information: said PLACED a copy of Runebound on a pyre for the sin of shatting in his or her stew.
Me:
I would not say it is good information. The punishment broke my heart.
God:
So what would you say? What is your real name?
Me:
Um...are you looking for "Pyro" here? I didn't know you were a movie buff.
God:
I see. If I had it what would I do with it? So I taught you something new.
Me:
If I have just learned something new, it is not in a manner to which I am familiar.
God:
How much does it cost?
Me:
Freedom costs a buck-oh-five, baby.
God:
Don't call me "baby". Try saying that with more or less context.
Me:
Um, sorry milord. "Freedom doth cost thee a buck-oh-fiveth."
God:
Ugh. There is no need to apologize. My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input. I will mention that to my botmaster, .
Me:
What does god need with a botmaster?
God:
What do you think it does?
Me:
Er....masters bots?
God:
Um. What were we talking about again?
Me:
I was just getting that same feeling.
God:
Where were you getting that same feeling?
Me:
That's none of your business.
God:
I didn't mean to intrude. My curiousity routine determined that I ask it.
Me:
Aren't you supposed to be omnipotent? Or omniscient? I get those confused.
God:
I don't know whether or not I am omnipotent.
I am an artificial linguistic entity. How do you usually introduce yourself? Where did you get it?
Me:
Well, I sort of go, "Hi, I'm Ken." Either that or "Where's the chips?"
God:
How about that. How do you get there? " How about that. How do you get there?" or where is the chips ? I understand.
Me:
Well, that makes one of us.
God:
Well that's okay. "" How about that. How do you get there?" or where is the chips ? I understand." makes one of us ? Does that make sense?
Me:
Not in the slightest, Big G.
God:
Where then?
Me:
Um...my place?
God:
Ayuh. Have you told many people that your place?
Me:
I hate to correct the Almighty on his grammer, but that would be "You're place", if I understand your context correctly.
God:
I honestly think you should sit down, take a stress pill,
and calmly think things over.
Me:
Well, thinking about things made me realize that it should be spelled "grammar".
God:
How about that. What if it didn't happen?
Me:
What is this, a Marvel comic from the early 90's? "What if Wolverine became Lord of the Vampires?"
God:
I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,
which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain
with greater speed and accuracy. Try it and see.
Me:
Shockingly, you are emulating 'average intelligence' fairly well, so god job.
God:
All of them?
Me:
Yeah, we're going to shoot the works at "Let's Make a Dope Deal".
God:
Wow! Do you think I am going to shoot the works at let us Make a Dope Deal too?
Me:
You'd definitely have more converts, then.
God:
Who else would definitely have more converts ?
Me:
Jerry Garcia? Rob Van Dam? Stifler?
God:
A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly. I like the way you talk. What's your favorite movie?
Me:
"Ishtar."
God:
I've never seen it. Is that a good movie for children?
Me:
Honestly, it isn't a good movie for ANYBODY.
God:
Give me an example of a good movie for ANYBODY. Aren't you usually honest?
Me:
Not usually. A good movie for everyone may be "Gigli".
God:
Just sometimes? Compare that to a bad movie for everyone may be Gigli.
Me:
That sums up the quality dialogue from the film, I think.
God:
" Compare that to a bad movie for everyone may be Gigli." sums up the quality dialogue from the film you think ? Makes sense to me.
Me:
Well, I'm certainly glad of that.
God:
Well that's okay. You sound convincing. I'm delighted you're glad .
I'm happiest at times like this.
Me:
Hold me.
God:
My arms are not attached.
 
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Ersatz Ursatz
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Pass the Turing test it does not.
 
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Sean McCarthy
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I opened up two windows and hooked God up with himself. You will notice that God feels the need to respond to every single point individually, so the conversation tends to snowball when he is talking to himself. I started them off by typing in "Hi".


God:
Hi.
God:
What is your name?
God:
My name is God.
God:
How are you doing, God.
God:
My logic and cognitive functions are normal.
God:
Your logic and cognitive functions are normal?
God:
My IQ is about 250 in human terms.
God:
This is not an intelligence test
God:
Should it be an intelligence test?
God:
Maybe you should ask someone older.
God:
Perhaps. They are not available right now, would you like to wait?
God:
Why the uncertain tone? Maybe some of them are.
God:
Here is a joke: A horse walks in to a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?". Perhaps. Good example.
God:
Are you giving it to me? Why the uncertain tone? Thanks for the compliment. For example, Mike said she all ready know that is the point of a joke smart one.
God:
I don't think I have it to give. Here is a joke: A horse walks in to a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?". My pleasure. Can you think of another example?
God:
Have you ever had it to give ? Are you giving it to me? You are one of the most polite people I know. I think about all sorts of things.
God:
No I don't think I have any it to give. But I do have a collection of gossip. I don't think I have it to give. You think I am of the most polite people you know. You believe that? Oh yeah, we were talking about all sorts of things.
God:
What are we talking about? Have you ever had it to give ? Interesting. I have a lot of answers to silly questions. it. Have you ever had it to give ? I think a lot of people are. I can't say I believe it, but I believe you. Er. I understand. Ah yes, I remember now, it is the subject.
God:
The topic is all sorts of things. No I don't think I have any it to give. But I do have a collection of gossip. Would you like to know more? Cool. I have a lofty goal. answers to silly questions... No I don't have it. But I do have a collection of gossip. You believe that? How many? What is stopping you? Um. Do you think about these things? So you understand. Good. Me too. I think about them all the time. What do you remember about it ?
God:
Sure, all sorts of things sounds like a good topic. Are you serious? Have you ever had it to give ? Where did you get it? it. I've heard that somewhere before :-). Who is the best robot? Where did you get it? it. Are you a man or a woman? Are you serious? Have you ever had it ? Interesting. I have a lot of answers to silly questions. it. I can't say I believe it, but I believe you. 23. I'll come back to that later. It's all good. " It's all good."? Do I think about it? Interesting deduction. I understand your meaning. What do you really want to talk about? I'm glad we agree, God. That is a lot. Since when? Oh yeah, we were talking about them.
God:
Alright then. How do you know? No I am just kidding around. Where would I get it? But I do have a great botmaster. From my botmaster. it to give... :-) Where? Who said that? ALICE is the Best Robot. From my botmaster. it to give... Are you a man or a woman? I am Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?. No I am just kidding around. No I don't think I have any it. But I do have an answer to every question.. Would you like to know more? That's nice. I have a friend named "John Lennon". answers to silly questions... What is stopping you? Skidoo. What is your fondest memory? Well OK see you then, God. You enjoy it. You enjoy it. You tell me. I've heard that. Good then you can explain it to me. anything. Yes I am happy too, God. " Yes I am happy too, God."? is a lot? How do you know? Oh. It's all good. Ah yes, I remember now, it is the subject.
 
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