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Subject: My mom makes a fuss that I have too many boardgames rss

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Isaac Heres
Israel
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She thinks I waist all my time and money putting into a lot of boardgames. She knows that I don't have a gaming group to join or have friends that can play with me. She makes a fuss because I have so many boardgames that I play by myself and most of them are not ment for solitare play. so I think she's right, but I like light and simple boardgames. My way of getting boardgames is not by me that pays out of his money. I have someone in the states every years wants to buy me something for my birthday and I give him a list of things he can get for me online.

Some new games I want to get this year are

Star Wars card game
Room 25
Police Precinct
Flash Point Fire Rescue

Now after the talk my mom had for me, does this mean I'd listen to her and not get these four games?
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Pasi Ojala
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Get the Imperial Assault Campaign module for Vassal from http://www.vassalengine.org/wiki/Module:Star_Wars:_Imperial_Assault
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If you "can afford" them (this means different things to different people), go ahead. You always spend money for your hobbies, board games are not any different. At least they keep their value (both money spent and continued entertainment value) much more than for example movies, whether viewed in theater or bought as DVD/BD.

And then, spend some effort and try to get other people to play them with you. The younger you are, the easier it is to build up your social circle. Do it while you have the time.

(Room 25 in suspicion mode is great for 5-6 players!)

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Bryan Thunkd
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If it is your money, and you are being financially responsible, and it makes you happy... I'd explain that to your mom and then continue. Maybe she is concerned that you are hiding yourself away from other people and being antisocial, and is just concerned for you? I think finding others who share your interest and forming a game night where you can socialize with others is something you should try to set up.
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CHAPEL
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Well, I don't know how old you are. If you are a kid and you live at home, I'd say do what your mom tells you.

If you are an adult and are on your own, well then, do what you like.

And if you're an adult and you live at home, well, then I think you already have your answer.
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John Kovacs
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I would add to the chorus that if you are being financially responsible, go ahead and continue with the boardgame purchases. Maybe you have a couple you're not playing you could sell or trade for new ones. Sure beats spending money on alcohol, drugs, or cigarettes - tell that to your mother!
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Jonathan Challis
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MWChapel wrote:

And if you're an adult and you live at home, well, then I think you already have your answer.


That's a very culturally biased assertion...

By far the majority of the worlds population live in cultures where offspring don't move out until marriage, and often only one sex even then.

Also even in the west, this is what's known as the boomerang generation due to the housing bubble and recessionary wealth implosion. Perhaps not in the US so much, I'm not sure, but all across western Europe it's an issue.
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Stephen Keller
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Well, like with any hobby or pattern of behavior it all comes down to the effect that it has on the rest of your life. If this activity/hobby is getting in the way of your responsibilities (like school, chores, work, etc), is creating a financial burden and utilizing your money when it could be used elsewhere (like being put in a savings account) or is creating a convenient excuse to not socialize then there could be a problem. If it's truly just an additional activity that you're doing then I see no harm.

You do kind of have to listen to you parent but it's important to try to understand where they're coming from. What else should you be doing? Would she be happier if you were putting the same amount of time into an Xbox? Should you be going outside and exercising and trying to form bonds with other humans? Try to talk to her and appreciate her concerns or fears. She has more life experience than you and may have a good reason. Then again, she might not.
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Stephen Keller
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MWChapel wrote:

And if you're an adult and you live at home, well, then I think you already have your answer.


Yeah...I'm starting to feel that a lot of people here just think that the only users here are from America.
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Matt Green
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I know a lot of people that play board games. None of them are slow-witted. You will be fine.
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Phil Christiansen
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Also BGG is a great place to make some gaming friends! I've seen several other posters with Israeli flags under they're names, so you never know what might happen if you try.
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Pieter
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If you are a minor and live with your mom, my advice is not to go against her wishes, but discuss it with her to find out what her reasons are. And explain to her what your perspective is.

If she argues: "You buy so many games that you do not play", that would mean that she is not against you buying games, but against you spending money on stuff that you do not use. You should be able to find a compromise in that situation, but I think that compromise starts with you finding a play group that allows you to actually open those boxes and use them.

Personally, I think that if you indeed buy games which you do not play, she has a good point. It is not as if these games go out of print soon. Buy them when you know that you will play them. Having games sitting on shelves and getting outdated (that happens with quite a few games, you know) just gets depressing after a while.
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J Holmes
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I recall the OP asking the same question roughly a year ago. The problem is here, a lot of people are addicted to buying games, or at least have more games than they probably should, so they'll encourage you.
As others have said, if you can afford the games, its ok, if you cant afford them, then its a problem.

Your mother probably understands that there is the direct fun of playing games with people (or solo gaming) but not understand there's the indirect fun of discovering new games coming out soon, finding the best deal, discussing elements of games and the like.
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eric chang
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i agree with all the bgg people that as long as you are finacially responsible then you should purchase the game that makes you happy. however, sometimes that doesn't matter and your mom only wants to see you save money or spend it on something else that is appropriate in her mind. in that case, i would just purchase them. when she ask you about the games later, just say that you bought those a while ago. and that is not a lie. whistle
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Richard Dewsbery
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Mine's constantly saying the same thing. I'm in my 40s, have a family, own my own house, and still she regularly says "sold any of those games yet?". I have no idea how many games I own - 2,000-odd would be a reasonable guess - so the argument could be made that I'm as much a collector as a gamer.

Hence my now-standard response - "you wouldn't ask a stamp-collector if he's sold off his stamps yet, would you?" It appears to be achieving a modicum of success (either that or she's just not talking to me this month).
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Robert Beachler
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Synnical77 wrote:
MWChapel wrote:

And if you're an adult and you live at home, well, then I think you already have your answer.


Yeah...I'm starting to feel that a lot of people here just think that the only users here are from America.


Very true and good point. In some places around the world families living together is normal and shows how close they are.

As for the OP. You could always resort to selling off games you either don't like or are tired of as well to help stave off your mom's opinion.
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Excessive Force
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Kelanen wrote:
MWChapel wrote:

And if you're an adult and you live at home, well, then I think you already have your answer.


That's a very culturally biased assertion...

By far the majority of the worlds population live in cultures where offspring don't move out until marriage, and often only one sex even then.

Also even in the west, this is what's known as the boomerang generation due to the housing bubble and recessionary wealth implosion. Perhaps not in the US so much, I'm not sure, but all across western Europe it's an issue.


It is? I haven't noticed or heard anything about that and last I checked Denmark was part of western Europe.

I'm not going to take part in the general discussion in this thread, but I cannot resist pointing out that bashing one person for using a culturally biased assertion while using one yourself as the counter argument is a little... strange.
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Isaac Heres
Israel
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Yeah I see where my mom is going with her statement and I think "why should I waist my money or tell someone to get a boardgame for me as a birthday gift idea when I should focus on some other gaming that I like more"....I'm talking about Console gaming on the PS3. and BGG has an option on this site to switch from a boardgaming site to a video gaming site (VGG)
 
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Wim van Gruisen
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j_holmes wrote:
I recall the OP asking the same question roughly a year ago.

Yeah. When I saw the title I thought that someone had necroed the thread.

To the OP: find some good advice here.
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Ralph T
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A simple rule of thumb: if the number of unplayed games exceeds ten, there is no way to justify getting more new games. I am guessing your unplayed games exceeds that.
 
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Chris Talmadge
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Tell her the boardgames are keeping you off the streets.

P.S. Stay off the streets.
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Ted Groth
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robbdaman wrote:
Synnical77 wrote:
MWChapel wrote:

And if you're an adult and you live at home, well, then I think you already have your answer.


Yeah...I'm starting to feel that a lot of people here just think that the only users here are from America.


Very true and good point. In some places around the world families living together is normal and shows how close they are.


What's wrong with living at home? That's where everybody lives! (except the homeless)

Seriously though, living with your parents if you are still dependent on them is quite a different thing than having your parents live with you or choosing to live as an extended familial group. That is true in any society. There wasn't much doubt which scenario MWChapel meant,

To the OP : This side discussion doesn't seem to have much to do with you, since you are talking about games as gifts rather than purchases. But it does sound like you are living with you Mother, and if so, she does get to have a say in what you do. What is more, she probably has point, even if not every detail of her argument is correct. Try to listen to the reasons behind what she says, and address that. I'm guessing she doesn't want to see you encouraging people to send you gifts that you don't really use, as that is wasteful, and disrespectful of the people who go to such effort.

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Josh Chen
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If you are still only living on Social welfare like your old thread with $100/month for allowance from the government living in a group home, I'd say listen to your mother.
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The Mad Hatter
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j_holmes wrote:
I recall the OP asking the same question roughly a year ago.


Yep.

http://www.boardgamegeek.com/thread/824410/my-mother-gives-m...
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Liam
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I'd sit down and chat with your mother.

If you didn't spend your money and time on games what would you spend it on?

What does she want you to be spending your money and time on?

I'm sure your mother just wants the best for you, so perhaps you could come to some sort of agreement.

She's probably just concerned that you spend a lot of time alone playing board games and she's been aware how disappointed and frustrated you've been in the past when you struggle with the rules of don't enjoy the game.

From your perspective, pointing out that playing games, tackling the rules and inventing your own variants is a lot more mentally stimulating, challenging, creative, rewarding and fun than just playing a computer game. You could also point out that through gaming you've gotten to communicate with other people all over the world via BGG and such communication helps sharpen your social skills.

Perhaps you could agree that you'll only spend X amount of money on board games per year, join some sort of club (gaming or otherwise) and pay to get lessons in something else.

Your mother is doing her job by showing concern and interest in what you're doing - your job as a son is to listen to your mother and to find a compromise between what she wants, what will make her happy and what you want to do. I suspect that this compromise will actually make you happier in the long run.
 
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Ms. Shug
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If I am remembering correctly the OP's previous posts, I believe his mother may have other concerns that might revolve around perhaps wanting her son to socialize more. That is just a guess related to a thread I remember about someone who was supposed to be traveling to Israel and bringing the OP games but then could not, and the disappointment that followed.

It's weird but I just filed "freak2geek" into my long term memory for some reason and it all came back.
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